I'm A Cop Who Lost Her Best Friend...

by Nat
(Kansas City, Kansas)

It was three a.m and my partner and I we're on the night shift together. I have been a cop for 3 years and he has been my partner since the academy. It was a quiet night til we we're on foot patrol through this shakie neighborhood, we heard gunshots. My partner Danny, was walking next to me until he jumped and pulled his gun. I followed him left and right I would go anywhere with him, I trusted him with my life as he did with his. And I let him down. I let him go the other way while I went one way. We both may eye contact from the other side of the street. That's when it happened.

The Drug dealer pulled his gun and said "don't move or I will shoot" I ran to the other side of the street and yelled "stop don't move" He turned to me shot me in the chest. It was caught in the vest then he turned to my partner and shot him twice in the back. I caught my breath crawled to him and grabbed him, and pulled him to my arms. I said he was going to be ok, but i knew he wasn't. That's when the EMT's came so they took him and then me. We we're in the ER together. Until he he bleed to death and died. I was so confused they had to put my under because I was "yelling to don't stop."

At the funeral I didn't shed a tear, still haven't to this day and im not until I catch the son of ...... who did this to my partner.

Comments for I'm A Cop Who Lost Her Best Friend...

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Jun 25, 2014
Feel so Alone
by: Josie

First & foremost I want to thank every police officer who puts their lives in danger every time you go to work. My heart goes out to you, his family and friends. Please don't beat yourself up it was not your fault don't dwell on thinking you could of done something different. Remember you were also hit but it was not your time to go we can never understand why things happen the way they do only God knows that answer. You have not grieved but believe me you will when it's your time we never know when it's going to hit us like a ton of bricks. You have placed your emotions aside & have focused your anger on the SOB who killed your friend/partner. May God comfort you & keep you safe.

Jun 25, 2014
I'm A Cop Who Lost Her Best Friend.....
by: Doreen UK

Nat I am so sorry for your loss of your partner to a senseless shooting. You can't blame yourself for letting your partner down. The mere fact you both went in different directions says that you wouldn't have gone against your training. Times you have to make split decisions and don't have time to process that decision. You were shot also. You are/were just as much a victim of an evil drug baron who had no respect for life. You could have been the one to die instead of your partner, and not live to tell the tale. Don't feel guilty that you lived and he died. You both protected each other on the job. There is so much danger out there and none of us knows when disaster will strike. If you believe in God then pray every day first thing for protection over your life and your partner/colleagues life. This is all we can do. PRAY FOR PROTECTION OVER EACH OTHER. I hope that in recovery you will have time to reflect and be kind to yourself and allow something good to come out of this tragedy.

Jun 25, 2014
For Nat
by: Debi

Nat, I read your post and I cannot begin to imagine what a horror this was for you. It is painful enough when your loved ones die - I lost my own beloved Mum very suddenly 2 months ago - but it is made so much worse by the fact you are just doing your job when it happens. I can feel your guilt and anger about what happened to your partner and your grief of course. Please, please, please don't blame yourself. You had a split second decision to make under great stress(both of you) and I doubt from what you have said that you could have changed anything. You defended your partner and got shot for it. You were prepared to die for him and this is the highest form of love anyone can have for a fellow human being and your partner knows and knew this. I don't know if you are able to continue with your work, but I have a very strong feeling that your partner will be right by your side as he always was. Speak to him just as you did when he was physically by your side and ask him for help. He will give it to you. You don't have to believe me Nat, but please just try it. It is natural that you feel anger, you have a lot to be angry about. But you and your partner represented love, comradeship and trust and believe me Nat these are SO much stronger than the anger you are feeling now and will conquer. The anger is blocking you from crying and that is normal, but also destructive as you have to grieve the partner you cared about. I have NO doubt that by asking your partner for help and trusting in the bond you had and still have you will be led to this vermin and you and your partner will have your day of justice. Death is not the end Nat. Simple as that. As someone who has lost every member of her family, please trust me a little on that. Your partner will be there when you ask him to be. Keep up a dialogue - if only in your head - and you will get answers and help. I wish you courage Nat and above all I wish you love.

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