In her loving arms..

by Cheena
(Puerto Princesa City, Palawan, Philippines)

Mama passed away last January 8, 2013 (Tuesday).

Back in my memory, Mama raised us with so much love that she could even sacrifice herself for her family. A very hardworking mama, ever supportive and sweet as ever.

Before she died, she was bed ridden for almost six years, she had no cancer and she was not comatose but she has a problem with her spinal cord, for that six years, i can see her guts and will to survive and be back to normal life,but i know that deep inside, she was so struggling physically and emotionally.

For 3 years, i was the one who took care of her, but when i graduated in college and started to work, my elder sister was the one who took care of her. But, as i wanted to see my mama to be healed, I continue to pray for her and providing all her needs.

Dawn of January 8, 2013 (I was not in the home).. my phone has 18 missed calls, I got nervous when finally answered my sister's call saying that mama was died! I am screaming and crying in pain that time. I rushed in the hospital at 5 am believing that i can talk with mama even a single lines, had so much guilt.. lots of ifs.. i should done this, should do that, we had last talked and sleep together on new years eve. Reported as dead on arrival, i don't know what to do seeing my mama covered with a white cloth.

Until now, i cannot move on and crying almost everyday, reminiscing all the memories that we had makes me cry and miss her so much. Last night I had a dreamed about her, in my dream I saw her embracing me in her loving arms while I'm crying and she told me "tama na ga, aalis na ako" (Stop that my dear, i will go now.)

Mama, I miss you so much.. Your memories will remain forever.

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