jason died of an over dose september 23 2012

by karen chism
(anniston al)

My son jason has always taken things to the extreme. But i could cope with the dare devil tricks, broken bones trips to the er. But the night he graduated high school 2006. I lost him that weekend. A friend introduced him to methadone. So the last seven years has been tramatic. Dui. Rolled his car. Getting jumped at a party and he was kicked in the back of his head. The doctor said if it wasn't for the drug induced state he was in, that kick would have killed him. Also 5 over dose's he started mixing methadone and xanax with alcohol. Each time I found him he was clinicaly dead. But not this last time. He was going to enter a rehab that was founded by a personal family friend monday. I spoke to my son saturday night at 6:30 pm. He sounded fine, but i had a bad feling, i asked if I could come and get him. He could spend the weekend and then start over on monday. He said he had a date that night but he would call me sunday morning and he would move in until rehab. The corner put his time of death between 8 pm - 9pm saturday night. The phone call i got sunday morning was from a close friend telling me my son was dead. I stood for hours outside his room until they pulled him out. He was bleeding eyes, nose, mouth, ears. He was so cold. I stood under a tree and said good bye to my son. Toxacolgy report will take months, but it looks like he did a speed ball. That is when methadone, xanax, and cocain is crushed, mixed and snorted. Its death in a second. A new friend showed him that trick. He wanted to be loved by everyone. The next day i cleaned out his rental, moved the bedding away, were he died was a drawing of jesus on the floor. My son had his salvation he was babtised 2003. I found letters and poems to jesus. My son was tormented but he knew GOD. But i still cannot let go.

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Sep 02, 2014
angel aniversary
by: Chism's mom

September 23 will mark the 2 year anniversary that I lost my Jason. Time does not heal the wounds nor does it get any easier. I miss you more each day that you are gone. Every time the phone rings, I hope in some sick way it's you calling me laughing at me, telling me it was just a joke! I pranked you good this time momz! But no such luck! I miss you son. Till we meet again in heaven
Love mom

Dec 10, 2012
Does it get better
by: Doreen U.K.

Dear Chism's Mum. I just read your post. You say that you are worried about your son you have left. You are divorced so have no one to talk to, and when you talk people just walk away. This is sad, when no one listens or can really hear what you are saying and don't validate your feelings but walk away. this is humiliating. I guess when other's are in your shoes only then will they understand. Everyone goes through some sadness in life. Perhaps some people just don't know what to say to you to make it better. Some people feel uncomfortable. This is how I also feel. Grieving people can't be cheered up. The hurt is so deep and unbearable. They just need someone to listen and understand. This shows they care even if they don't have the answer. Some people go to see a counsellor. They pay for the privelege of someone listening to them and understanding. I DID THIS. I came away feeling so much better and I developed skills I can use to my advantage today.
It is the worst pain for a mother to lose a child/Adult child. I am glad your son Knew Jesus. This would make a difference to his future. You will see your son again. It is just the hurt you have to live with by him not being with you on a daily basis and the interaction with him that you will miss. You said "DOES IT GET BETTER." It has to otherwise our grief would kill us. I think it will just take a bit longer when you lose a child or a spouse where the bond is stronger. A child is attached to its mother by an umbilical cord. Sometimes the bond between a mother and child is so strong it feels as if the umbilical cord was never cut. The child is still attached to the mother. Most mothers could tell the same story. So it is with the loss of a mother or father the child will have these same feelings of loss. DEATH is the time that this CORD is really cut and the PAIN is severe. We are then LEFT very much on our own.
I hope that you are in a much better place and have family and friends who will support you. Pray and Leave your other son in God's hand's. With God's protection over him God will take on this worry. I had to do this otherwise worry would make me ill. May God comfort you in your sorrow and grief.

Dec 09, 2012
by: chism's mom

Wow! When GOD gives whippings he gets attention.
Since chism's death I have been in deep prayer and fasting.
I wanted GOD to answer for taking my boy from me.
I have begged, pleaded, screamed, cussed, ranted and raved.
the whole time I was talking, I was not listening.
Some doors were closing in my face.
Big ones were opening. I could not see them through the veil of tears.
Now I know my son didn't die in vain. I have peace in my heart knowing he is sitting at the feet of Jesus. Looking down and laughing at his over reacting momma.
I have been approached by the CROSS. Its a ministry to witnesses to inmates. My son was one of those at one point.
I will be chism's voice. I will give his testimony on Jan. 15th.
I hope I make him proud. I pray that I can be a witness to others. My prayer is that no parent should ever wonder if their baby was saved by the grace of GOD. I was tormented the night my son died. Asking my self were is he? Heaven or Hell. I got my answer the very next day, when it was confirmed by so many he had witnessed to. His drawings and and poem. I feel to my knees and thanked GOD for being his Savior. I was mad because I thought my boy died alone. I blamed my self. But Jesus was there. And even though I miss him, I know I will see him again. He didn't die in vain. GOD couldn't use him on earth. But he is in heaven.

Oct 21, 2012
I feel your pain
by: Debbie

Its been two years since my son Jeremy passed away.I havent been on this site in awhile! When I first came to this site I was so alone! My son Jeremy shot himself!He had so called friends around him when he passed away(I cannot find closure) to his death.It does get better,(whatever thats suppose to mean)! My son had been drinking with his friends when he went to the bathroom with his gun.But they knew he was depressed and had a gun with him too!They were in the other room when they heard the blast.Time does heal!but it cannot come soon enough, I know!I live in Bham.I am so sorry for your loss!Please know we are all in this pain together! We do understand!

Oct 19, 2012
Over does
by: Eba

Ahhhhhhhh my youngest son died on the 21/2/2011,he was only 26yrs old ,and I miss him like crazy ,why I love him? Not becoz he was my youngest child but coz he was very polite has heart of gold forgive ,and give ppl what ever they want ,help poor ppl ,adores me ,am tacan Cepralex 2calm me down ,only 2day I was able to cry 'I missssssss u son

Oct 11, 2012
My Daughter Dee Dee Died September 20, 2012
by: Anonymous

We do not know as of yet what caused my Daughters death. It could have been an overdose or her so called boyfriend killed her since she had $750,000.00 insurance policy in his name. He is a drug dealer in Tampa, Florida and the police have done nothing about him. When they went to get my daughters body, he was so high they could not understand him. But they have left him alone. Where is the justice in this? My daughter is dead and he is walking the streets to kill someone else.

Oct 07, 2012
by: Cindi

My son, Bradley, just died Sept 28, 2012 on his 24th birthday. He too had a long drug history (9 years) I tried to prepare myself over the years for this...but it is still just sucking the life out of me. I am sooo sad! Thru all his struggles, rehabs, homes, jobs, i never gave up hope. Maybe tomorrow he would meet that special person that could make him feel that life could be ok living clean. Or maybe he would meet that special counselor in yet another rehab that would flip a switch in him and give him hope! It is still very new and I am raw...but I need to find a different direction for all that hope i had. I can't just let it die with him. Thru it all we kept a loving relationship and I always made sure he knew how much I loved him. For that I am greatful...:(

Oct 07, 2012
Jason died of an over dose september 23 2012
by: Doreen U.K.

Karen I am sorry for your loss of your son Jason to a drug overdose. If only our children didn't mix with people who influenced them in ways that weren't good! But such is life. We cannot protect our Adult children from those who could influence them in ways that would end their life. I am so glad to hear of your son Knowing Jesus. This will help your grief. To know that he didn't die without salvation.
My nephew was 30yrs. of age when he threw himself in front of an express train. He also knew Jesus. He was suffering depression and the side effects of his medication caused suicidal feelings. My sister was mad with grief and needed the support of a grief counsellor to help her and it did make a difference. Her recovery has been that much quicker. But she will have the scars and some pain forever. It just doesn't hurt her every day now. Part of my sister's grief is "Why didn't Jesus save him, He could have because He knew Jesus." There are no answers. I lost my husband to cancer 5 months ago and whilst we prayed for Healing this did not happen. I am in grief now, and it is getting worse now I feel my loss more.
You need to surround yourself with supportive friends and family till you are able to cope with your loss.

Oct 07, 2012
Jason died of an over dose September 23
by: Wondra

Don't let go of the love you have for your son. Don't let go of what your son meant to you. Regardless of how he lived or died that bond is not broken. I am so sorry for the lost of your beloved, giving, and well liked son. God bless you and give you peace.

Oct 07, 2012
does it get better
by: chism's mom

I want to thank the people for commenting on jasons page. I know that i am not the only momma that has lost thier baby. My world has been shattered, i just want to know how and if i will be able function again. I really dont have any one to talk to. They want to change the subject. And i am divorced, so i need some coping skills, i need to be there for my other son, he is also having a hard time with jasons death? His brother chris is an over the road truck driver, he has alot of alone time to think. I worry about him to.

Oct 07, 2012
so sorry
by: Cathy

Hi Karen i am so sorry for the loss of your beloved angel Jason. It will be a year on 18th October since i lost my son Brandon , even though you know everything and you did your best you can never let go of them, my son too led a fast life and he would not listen but its awful to see them go . I know what u are going though and you have to go through this journey of grief and i pray to god to help you bear the loss of your son

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