Joshua Coleman Waddle, 1990-2009

by Jessica
(Arkansas)

Josh & I,  Spring Break 2008: Disney World

Josh & I, Spring Break 2008: Disney World

On Thursday, October 29th, 2009 my brother died. You, see. I'm the girl with the perfect fairytale family, two older brothers. Great mom & dad. And even outside of that, nothing bad's ever happened to me.

Josh was 19 years old, going to college, majoring in Coaching & minoring as an Algebra teacher. He was only 19. For some reason, Arkansas had just about the rainiest October ever. On the 29th, it was raining really hard. Like, so hard that you could hardly see the road. We live in a small town and Josh lived in a dorm at his college a good hour and a half away. He had a college class, along with two of his friends, the class was about 10 minutes out of town. That night through the rain and the storming they managed to wreck. They were in a truck. Billy Watts in the backseat, my brothers best friend since the were in Kindergarten, Josh Atchley was driving, and my brother Josh was in the passenger seat. My mom got a frantic call from Josh's fiance, Hannah (they dated for 3 1/2 years). She said she knew something was wrong and she and her friend went looking for him.

My mom comes into my room, tells me to get dressed, because Josh has been in a wreck. (This is about 9:00 at night). My mom was on her knees praying in our kitchen, shaking. Her and I both were getting ready to go to a hospital. My dad was on hold with some hospital he had called. I stepped outside into our garage to put something in the bag I'd grabbed and thrown into our vehicle. I see headlights. There's a police car. I run inside shaking. He knocks on our front door and comes inside. My mom, so strong, falls to her knees in hysterical cries. My dad looks at the officer and says, please don't give me the news that I think you're going to give me.

Police officer: Are you Bruce and Carla Waddle, parents of Josh Waddle? Then we knew. I was in shock, just... stunned. My head was screaming "No, NO, he's here, he's SUPPOSED to be here, he can't JUST LEAVE, he's here, he always has been, CAN'T THEY DO SOMETHING?" My head goes a million miles per hour, I can't cry. My mom and dad are on their knees, crying hysterically. People show up immediately, they found out so fast. My mom grabs a picture of him off our mantle and hugs it as tight as she can. I've never seen my mom cry but once or twice. Much less like this. My other brother, Jake, 21 comes in from Fort Smith (1 hour away) with his wife. I've never seen him so quiet.

My head is still spinning. I never imagined this would happen. Never. Josh was my big brother. The one who was always supposed to be there and always was supposed to be there Christmas morning, and to help me with math homework and crack everyone up laughing on the million hour long road trips. Always.

The truck hydoplaned and ended up hitting a big truck. I don't know what exactly happened to Josh, or if I even want to find out what caused him to die. Josh Atchley, my bubba's best friend, was driving and now lives with the grief and medical problems. Billy Watts was awake through the whole wreck. He never knocked out.

I am 14 years old, my name is Jessica. I feel angry all the time and I just don't know what to do anymore. I went from being the happiest and most bubbly person ever, to being so weak and easily-angered, that I don't want to get up in the morning.

I thank God every day for keeping my bubba safe in heaven. I love my Lord Jesus Christ with all my heart, soul, and mind. One thing this whole situation has showed me, is that you're never promised tomorrow, and if you're not right with God, you better get there. You never know when your life is going to end. I love you, Joshy.

Love, your baby sister<3 Jessica.

Comments for Joshua Coleman Waddle, 1990-2009

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Oct 11, 2013
Jessica
by: Elizabeth

Jessica, here it is, a few years after the car crash. I am 53 years old, a housewife that lives in Dallas.
Can I tell you that I feel closer to Jesus, this midnight. The reason why is you-you-you. After going thru ALL you have been thru, in the testimony you wrote above, you said, 'I love Jesus with all my heart, mind, & soul.'
You're so young to be such a good example to me. THANK YOU! Elizabeth

Oct 11, 2013
Jessica
by: Elizabeth

Jessica, here it is, a few years after the car crash. I am 53 years old, a housewife that lives in Dallas.
Can I tell you that I feel closer to Jesus, this midnight. The reason why is you-you-you. After going thru ALL you have been thru, in the testimony you wrote above, you said, 'I love Jesus with all my heart, mind, & soul.'
You're so young to be such a good example to me. THANK YOU! Elizabeth

Oct 10, 2010
Tommy & Josh
by: Jimmy

Jessica, You know who I am but we know little of each other. I am your great uncle Jimmy. I too lost my older brother Tommy as you have heard. I was 16 & when I say what Josh would want, I am taking from what I know what Tommy would want for me. Tommy was my hero & I dressed, tried to walk & talk as he. I'm here to tell you he wants you to enjoy life, live it to the fullest! Don't be afraid of being happy! Laughing & being happy are the greatest healing that Jesus gave us!

There won't be a day go by the rest of your life that you won't think of Josh & this I tell you from experience. I never knew how to approach you but I have lived a long life without my only Brother & I know things would have been different had he still been with us; but he for sure would not want me to use him for anything but positive inspirational things. You may feel free to call me any time to talk. Ask your aunt Jeanine for my #. I Love You!

May 10, 2010
Friend in Christ
by: Vera

Dear Jessica--my heart aches for you. However, you have something a lot of teens don't have--and that is a belief in your Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. He is strong for you, He is your peace. Read the Word of God for comfort. God Bless You. You will see Josh again. I pray that God grant you peace, prosperity, and joy. Amen.

Apr 02, 2010
I CAN FEEL UR PAIN
by: Anonymous

Dear jessica, what to tell u? I am just another ill-fortunate sis like u...my bro, the only son of my parents, left us forever on the dec 30,2009..he was only 18..still living the pain with disbelief..how could he go? On such a silliest incident? know how did it happen? He choked..simply choked to death..he was the most amazing kiddo of his age..he was a lovinj son, a caring bro, bestest buddy among his circle..a talented musician..and so on..he left away taking all the happiness of our life..which would never be the same...

Jan 30, 2010
My 18 year old brother died too
by: Anonymous

Jessica,
My name is Ashlyn. I am 11 and I have two older brothers as well, only one of them lives in heaven with Jesus.

Landon was killed in a car wreck in Nov of 2008. My Mom is so sad all the time even though she tries to fake it now. My Dad is too; but my parents, are divorced but are close friends.

It's been over a year and my mom still cries and my dad will not go visit my brothers grave ever. My stepdad is great and does so much for my brother and I even though he is hurting too. My parents are broken, it's like they don't work well anymore. My brother and I are doing better, I just pray my Mom and Dad will recover one day totally. I miss my big brother too... I'm sorry your brother died.

Ashlyn

Dec 09, 2009
Similar
by: Shane Y.

My brother died on Nov. 11 in an automobile accident at about 12:15 at night. At about 2:30, a cop shows up and tells us what happened. It is crazy how alike our stories can be.

Dec 09, 2009
TO JESSICA------JOSH WADDLE
by: ANN

DEAR JESSICA,
WHEN I READ YOUR SAD LETTER, ONE IMPORTANT THING STOOD OUT, OF COURSE, BESIDES THE GRIEF.
IT WAS, "I LOVE THE LORD JESUS CHRIST WITH ALL MY HEART'". YOU HAVE WHAT A LOT OF GRIEVING PEOPLE DO NOT HAVE. FAITH AND TRUST THAT GOD WILL BE WITH YOU AND YOUR FAMILY EVERY STEP OF THE WAY THROUGH THIS TERRIBLE HURT.

I AM SO SORRY FOR THE LOSS OF YOUR DEAR BROTHER.
GIVE YOUR PAIN TO CHRIST AND LET HIM HELP YOU CARRY YOUR HEAVY BURDEN. IN MY LIFE, I HAVE LEARNED THAT GOD AND TIME EASE ALL PAIN.
I WISH YOU PEACE AND MAY YOU BE WRAPPED IN THE HEALING WARMTH OF GOD. YOU'LL BE IN MY PRAYERS.

Dec 09, 2009
Sorry for your loss
by: Donna in CA

I just lost my big brother October 14, 2009 and I know what you are saying. He was supposed to be there for all those things that were so special to us both. Life had other plans; and I too know he, and my father, will be waiting for me when I arrive in heaven. It is important to feel all the feelings associated with losing someone so tragically. I am going to look for a grief support group to join. Even if I don't talk, I believe it will help just to hear other stories like yours, to help me heal. I am sending healing and blessings to you and your family. Fondly

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