Lost my grandmother (nanny) 10 years ago and still struggle with the loss, I didn't visit her enough in hospital due to miscommunication with my dad and sub consciously not liking seeing her in a hospital bed. What's worse is she asked one of my siblings why I hadn't been back to see her. I loved her more than anything in the world, I really miss her. I hate to think that she wanted me there, and I never came. I honestly don't think I will ever get over that. I have 2 children now and am planning my wedding. I feel grief stricken knowing she won't be there.