July 11, 2014 I lost my grandma (mom)

by monique
(south carolina)

I lost my grandma (mom), July 11, 2014 she was 96 years old. She did live a full life and I know she is resting and I will see here again. My grandparents raised me since I was a child. My parents were divorced when I was a child and I don't really know much about why they divorce, but I know that my grandparents pretty much modeled to me what a family (mom,father, child) relationship was. I grew up in this house and still live here since I was a child. My grandpa died July 15, 1994. 20 years later and 4 days before my grandpa died at 86, my grandma passed. It really hurt because I felt that with my grandma here she still was the glue that held it all together. My dad would come over everyday to help and when he leaves it would be just me and her. We shared so much together and as she gotten older and less able to do things. I enjoyed taking care of her because I loved her so much. I would do it all over again. 2 years ago I got ill hbp so I asked my grandma was it okay my mom come stay with us to help me out as meaning shift the daily washing clothes,cooking,cleaning her etc we shared it. Being that my father was the only child and my grandma saw me as her daughter. It really helped me out. The morning I woke up to get my grandma up to get dress. Before I even went into the room, for 10 to 15 minutes something did not feel right in my heart. I felt like something happen and to go into the room and saw that my grandma would not responded to me saying time to get up. She had this thing where she knew I would be in her room in the morning to wake her up so she would literally go stiff on you because she was already up and looked at the clock and knew I was coming soon so she played sleep hard and lock her body in a minute on you. I did all the things you would do to see if she was alive while speaking to the 911. She had a DNR request. My heart broke that morning again because when my grandpa died I was a teenager and something woke me up to go into the room and my grandma and I noticed my grandpa passed. He was very sick and she pretty much took care of him in the house until his death. Two days before my grandma death we went out and she asked me for new pillows, and wanted a book from the library (Little Women), and wanted her phone. That evening for some reason I cried and I did not know why. I am believing that inside I knew she would be passing and just now making sense. Anyhow the day I lost my grandma really hurt me and I lean onto God because we both believed in him. I just miss her presence because living here with her my entire life. Her presence is strong in here and I just miss doing everything with her. I dont want to write so much cause I am still crying

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Sep 07, 2014
Angela bless you
by: Monique

Angela God bless you. I began to read your replied and you are finishing my entire story playing out as we speak. I am so thankful you found me and I am able to speak with you. I send my hugs and comfort to you and know that no matter the distance we can be their for one another. I have disconnected in many ways but it found me getting closer to God. I am here if you ever want to write to me. We can both go through this together. As I write this trying not to cry.

Sep 07, 2014
I too lost my GrandMom.
by: Angela

It's been a year since the passing of my grandmother and I feel your pain, I threw my self to full time / over time working just to disconnect from the drama of the fall out! Family playing tug of war over her estate and its far more detailed to go into. Just let me say this! Today is week 3 of laying in bed and refusing to engage in anything but food and sleep, when I am awake it's hard to breathe, I feel worthless, depressed and all I do is cry! I'm so lost with out her, I miss her hugs and just her presence in the room, my family has exhausted their patience with my recovery at this point. I have sought counseling and therapy to no avail. I'm not giving up hope at this point but I just keep praying to God for some direction. My story is much like yours in so many ways. I found by reading your story a long stream if tears began to flow as steady as a river and some where in my being, I managed to engage myself with you, if for nothing else just to say you are not Alone! God bless you my dear girl. Those are the words my GrandMom always spoke to my ear as I would hug her. Now they are mine spoken to you! ((Hugs)) Sincerely, Angela

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