Kandy Kat

by Julie Bolliger
(Phoenix, AZ)

A tiny little feral kitten approached me five years ago when I was walking through my neighborhood. For the first couple years, she showed up sporadically. She would torment my old dog in the backyard and sit on my kitchen window sill.

I understood from the beginning that she wasn't a house cat. She offered affection but only on her terms and then only for a couple of seconds at a time. There was to be no fawning and cooing over her.

One February she showed up dizzy and disoriented. I thought someone had hit her over the head with a two by four. We gave her some leftover antibiotic from our other cat and she began to respond and get well. Turns out she had an inner ear infection. Anyway, from that point on, she sort of became the garage kitty. We fixed up a palette on the floor but she could jump from the top of the truck into the crawl space attic and sleep there during the winter.

I fed her every morning and night and we developed a routine where I would go out each night around 9:00 and check on her. It got so she would rub against my legs and I would scratch her back and actually give her hugs. She was a part of my life but I wasn't responsible for her. She was half wild and lived on her own terms.

She died on October 20, 2008. Someone hit her in front of my house and I found her. I am sad and stunned at the depth of loss I feel and what she meant to me. There are still kitty dust paws on the truck and I look for her when I pull in the garage.