Life Part 2...

by Hope
(VA.)

As the day stretches before me and I once again try to make the 2nd half my life mean... something. So we (my son and I) head to an Art Museum...A Schwans truck passes, reminding me of the day long ago that I met him at a company picnic.

Yesterday the local ambulance/rescue squad was behind me. The same one that attempted to help him that fateful day. The day that he was "taken" from me so very long ago. Life does seem to go on without him. More surprising is that I am going on without him, that I have managed/stubbled along thus far both emotionally and financially .

I don't know what I will make of this life, the 2nd part- Life without Paul. I do know that I try not to waste another day. Grief stole who I was and while I try to find out who I am now I will take in all experiences that life has to offer.

We all learned the hard way that life is too short and can be taken from us in the blink of an eye.
HH

Comments for Life Part 2...

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Aug 01, 2011
Thanks Hope
by: TrishJ

Thank you Hope. I remember the first time I posted on this site. It was about 10 days after Joe died. Christmas was coming and I couldn't get myself out of the fetal position. None of my friends or family have lost their husbands so nobody really understood. Your first response to my post was so heart warming and needed. Your words were so encouraging.
You truly inspire me. Like I said before I pray that I have made the progress you have when another year has passed.
Pen Pals? What's wrong with that. Definitely sisters in grief.
Hugs & blessings.
PJ

Aug 01, 2011
Life Part 2
by: Judy

Hope,

Like you I am off on the adventure of trying to figure out who I am in the new life I have been given. I have spent a lot of time alone lately and while I have periods of loneliness, I think a certain amount of alone time is necessary for this new person to evolve. I've spent some time and some anxiety, trying to figure out who I am now that my major life roles (wife, mother) are gone. In the end it comes down to just yourself, who you are as a person. I'm trying now to shape that person into someone I really like. Almost like being an adolescent again except wiser. Barry always said life was an adventure. He's right.

Struggling along on this new path,

JM

Jul 31, 2011
Life Part 2
by: Donna

Hope,
You have always been there, letting me know that my feelings are ok, and I thank you. I don't know what I am going to do without Bryan in my life but you give me hope for the future. I am also going to try and go forward and take advantage of new experiences or opportunities when they present themselves. My new life will consist of mainly teaching my grandchildren all about their wonderful grandpa, and if life presents new adventures then I will try honestly try to go with it by myself (without Bryan). I wish you (and every one on this site) the best in your new future. As always I go one breath, one step, one day at a time I love you always Bryan

Jul 31, 2011
Life Part 2
by: Mari

Hope, it sounds as if you are doing well. I realize there will be sad moments and memories. I like what you said about taking in all life has to offer. You have a great attitude. That to me sounds like you have come a long way. I don't think we will ever be the same but we can make some kind of life for ourselves.

It has been a little more then 1 yr and 8 months since my husband went to be with the Lord. I am doing fine on my job and working here on the complex.

I have repainted and refurnished the whole house and it looks pretty. I still miss my husband and always will but I just have to go on.I am feeling much more positive, much stronger. I have a loving family, plenty of grandchildren and the little great grandbaby. Keep posting. We care for you. You are a source of encouragement to all.

Jul 30, 2011
surviving grief one day at a time
by: HH

Trish,

I know this is not a place for pen pal correspondence but I really want to let you know that I have admired your way of finding your way through grief. I understand wanting them back, wanting our old life back.

We evolve into a new life we detest at first because we have to. I can only speak for me because I grew so tired of my self that was in some sort of limbo. Amputated from the life that I had and too scared and depressed to make a new life for myself.

I guess in essence got pissed off at grief running my life.

Grief and I are not done with our battle, But I am not giving up on myself or the life I deserve....The life that Paul would want for me and expect me to live. I will Never stop Loving him or Missing him.

I am not grabbing happiness with both hands I just try not to drop it when it is offered to me. My best to you always...
Hope

Jul 30, 2011
Prayer
by: geoffrey pyne campbell

Prayer will help. I only had one girl friend in my life, a school teacher with a little boy. When I lost her and her son, I lost all zest for life, I lost my company, and ended up in the hospital as all I did was cry. Years passed..then I got a pet, which really loved me, named her Miss Blue.. and once again I was needed and loved, and once again I felt what it was like to be truly loved. But when I lost her grief so strong came, to lose the only creature that existed on earth that loved me, and all hope seemed lost, till I prayed and felt the love of God who loves me, and more importantly at this time, you. Never forget that, and as it is written, "Ye have not, because ye ask not." So ask for your Heavenly Father to wrap His arms around you and comfort you with His presence dear friend.

Jul 30, 2011
Bless You Hope
by: TrishJ

As I try to, journey through this lonely life the thing that I seem to be focusing on is that I want my old life with Joe. I know I have to get past it but it's really hard. I'm just going into the last four months of the first year (the home stretch). I want to feel that love and security that was stolen from me that awful day but the thought of another man is something I can't even bear to think of at this point.
I look at what you are going through and hope I will be even close to where you are in one year from now. I have a few good days here and there but mostly I'm dwelling in the past and yearning to feel that safe feeling again but too fragile to search for it. I know I have to go on find a new life but it's just so damn hard. It's easier right now to stay in my comfort zone with my memories of my husband.
I wish you happiness Hope. You have come so far.
Peace and happiness.
Admiring you.
PJ

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