Losing an ex to another woman and then he dies

by Toni Charleton
(New York, N.Y.)

I was in an abusive marriage for 25 years. I finally got out of that and found a man whom I really cared about. We dated for a year and then broke up. In the meantime, he started a relationship with someone else. After four years of my waiting for him and praying, we got back together and began to live together. We have been together for the past seven years. He began drinking and I told him to stop drinking or else he would have to leave. He chose to leave. I was in contact with him for the next month off and on as he was living in his own place. We had an argument and the next thing he was on a dating site. He found someone and began living with her after the first date. We had only been broken up for a total of six weeks and were not talking for just the last two weeks. I had hoped he would come back to me, prayed for it to happen again. This week he passed away. I was dealing with the grief of losing him to another woman, although I hoped he would come back. NOw he is gone forever and I can't stand the pain of knowing he will never come back.

Comments for Losing an ex to another woman and then he dies

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Apr 13, 2014
So sorry for your loss and pain.
by: Anonymous

I am so sorry for your loss and your pain.

I believe God has a plan for each of us, and we may never know the answers as to why these things happen.

You must find your inner strength and continue your journey as I believe there is someone out there for everyone.

God Bless and good luck in all life's travels.

Apr 13, 2014
Losing an ex to another woman and then he dies
by: Doreen UK

Toni I am so sorry for your loss of Your Ex to another woman and then to dying.
It is so painful to break up from a relationship. It is just as painful a grief. But when our loved one dies it is the worst pain in the world to endure. Knowing our loved one is not coming back is so very painful too deal with. No use now harking on about why you both couldn't work out something before he left you to another woman. But it is no use beating yourself up for thinking you could have done things better. WE are all at a crossroad some time in our lives wishing we had made better decisions and having to live with the consequences forever. I wonder how when we grieve that we somehow take responsibility for the total problem? Grief does assault us physically, and emotionally, and we just can't find the answers to go on living in Peace. We will all live with some REGRETS in life. It is how it is. Even our loved one's who died are responsible for many REGRETS. It is part of our human nature to FAIL and FALTER. Pick ourselves up and try to do it better. Lucky for some who get a second chance.
The pain will come from knowing that he died with another woman and not you. You have a double grief to bear losing him twice.
It is only DAILY that you will HEAL from the loss of this man you loved and lost. It just kills you inside when they die. For now you will have to place your FOCUS on losing him in death. You may find some relief in seeing a counsellor who will direct your grief using their skills so that you are able to process each loss so you can RESOLVE these issues and re-direct your thinking so you can survive this awful grief. Just remember you can't feel this bad forever. There comes a day when we can put our grief to rest. But for each of us this is a personal loss and Healing. May God draw near to you and comfort you in this SORROW and give you His Peace.

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