Losing Barry, my sweet son.

by Chris
(Virginia Beach, Virginia)

The call came just two weeks ago just before dawn. Always, a call at that time is scary. My son was a heavy drinker from the age of 20 and caused my late husband and me untold pain. He was sober but died at the age of 45 just three days before his birthday. I am having a terrible time and just finished a long cry, the second one since his death. I feel, or to be or accurate, feel nothing, just numb. I need to be strong for my daughter who was also close to Barry but do not know how to do that without stuffing my feelings. My heart is broken, not in two, but in a million little shreds and I do not know what to do next. Since this is suppose to be about me, I will not say too much about Barry now, he was very loved but lived a tragic life due to excessive drinking. Thank God for my big black dog, he is a big comfort. I need to go to the bank, shop for food and just can't get in the car and do it. Maybe after writing this I can.

Comments for Losing Barry, my sweet son.

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Apr 25, 2011
Loosing Barry
by: M Mack


Parents shouldn't have to bury their children. I am sorry for your loss and can tell you that this grieving process is a long road of ups and downs. A mother always has a special kind of relationship with their son, sort of like the unspoken word and a faithful bond unable to be broken.

You are still numb, trying to come to terms of what happened. Let the tears fall, they refresh your soul. Let the dishes sit, they will be there. Don't worry about anything right now. Order take out, stay home and only do what you have to do to survive. Barry was not well and didn't have control over his addiction. Even as his parents, it was out of your control.

It's good you found this site. Read the older posts and I'm sure you will read everything you feel. You're not alone here and writing done your feelings are a form of self therapy. Come to this site as often as you need to. We listen and cannot always give the best advise, but one thing I've learned is........on breath, one step, one day at a time.

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