losing my mom and my daughter 10 months apart

by brenda branham
(auburn illinois)

hi my name is brenda i have been to hell and back my life has come to a halt and i dont know how to move on it started out as vertigo that put me in a deep depresssion which i had to be medicated for and when some meds didnt work my husband then kept me drugged all the time went to the hospital and found an awesome doctor to help me to get threw all the drugs he put in my system which my mom and daughter helped me wean off them without him knowing they were my life savors 6 months later my dad had a stroke and i moved my mom and dad in with me to take care of them my dad was paralyzed 1 month later my mom fell out her bed and died in my home which was terrible to deal with and still have to live their i was so concerned about my dad and their home they had to leave so i asked my daughter and her husband and their 2 boys to move in to take care of my dads house and 10 months later i get a call at 7am that my daughters husband came home from work and found my daughter dead in bed she was 28 yrs old and very healthy she was a nurse so the autopsy ruled to be unfounded of the cause of her death it is now 3 years later and everyday i try to figure a way out of this world to be with my mom and daughter but i have 2 other children and 3 grandkids who need me to i cope everyday to live on but its a struggle i dont know what else to do i cant live like this forever and also lost my job of 10 years because of my deprssion i hope someone can give me some advice to help me out thank u for reading this its just a lil of what i have been threw in my life brenda

Comments for losing my mom and my daughter 10 months apart

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Mar 03, 2013
losing my mom and my daughter 10 months apart
by: Doreen U.K.

Brenda I am sorry for your loss of your mom and daughter. Two HUGE losses in your life. I am also sorry for your dad's loss of health and the difficulties this causes being a carer. You did the most unselfish thing by taking your parent's into your home and caring for them. It was also a very astute decision for you to suggest your daughter, husband and son take care of your dad's home whilst he was being cared for by you and not able to live on his own. It is just so sad that your daughter died in her sleep apparently whilst her husband was at work. It will be most difficult with your grief to not have any answers as to how your daughter died. Often we just have to accept what has happened and grieve a loss for what it is. How is your dad now? You are in a very hard place having to care for your grandkids and at the same time being so beaten down with grief that will make you feel as we all do that we wished we could die. Often we can feel as if we do have too much to bear in life and can't cope. You may have to seek help from social services or your doctor or some organisation who will be responsible for giving you a break. In this break you may benefit from grief counselling and also have this space for YOU. You need to process these losses and how to move forward with active young grandchildren who may wear you out at times. You need to put some support in place for yourself so that you are not left struggling all alone. Again I am sorry for your losses and also the difficulties you are facing right now.

Mar 03, 2013
He Can Help You If You Let Him
by: Anonymous

Living in hell, yes, I get it. That's how this past year has been for me. But, I have handed it all over to God. He is the one who took the love of my life, and as far as I'm concerned He can now clean up the mess that is me. And, you know what, even though I have such incredible sadness, He has helped me through the suffocating depression. Prayer, faith, hope. This immense grief serves some purpose that will be revealed to me down the road. Right now, I think of it as my love "graduating." He beat me in fulfilling his purpose here. This means, I just need to work that much harder to fulfill my purpose. It's better that He controls that and not us, else we all would have thrown in the towel a long time ago. For now, I will trust Him as painful and miserable as that may be at times. One day, it will all make sense. For now, I cling to Him. I know He can help me, and I also know He can help you if you let Him.

Mar 03, 2013
may God be with you
by: Anonymous

wow the autopsy report was unfounded?! did know they could be if it was done relatively fast, know wonder your sad! I'm glad you realize you have others that need you, all i can say is please have faith even though you can't see it believe for he does not work for evil only good. im prayin for you!

Mar 02, 2013
Your losses
by: Anonymous

Your losses are deep as all of ours on here are. The only thing to do is keep struggling through one day at a time and to be grateful whenever we can be at little things to keep us going.
God be with you.

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