Losing my mum , losing my friend
by Karine Mazuy
(Ashford Kent )
I lost my mum in december and have experienced intense grief since, some days are worse than others, I am at utter loss without her, I looked after her for 2 years when she was diagnosed with Alzheimer ... so i have the feeling I lost her twice.
This is the hardest experience, I have lost my dad 12 years ago and found myself becoming increasingly distressed at the thought of not having no parents left.
Some days, I am ok and some other days, it hit me so hard I found myself "dragged into a black hole" without any hope of finding happiness again.
You are never prepared for the death of a loved one, I cherish the memory, I am so scared of not remembering her voice, her laugh ...
All i know is that you pay the price of grief for loving somebody so much.