Losing Scotty Rock

by Cindi Seeley
(Biddeford, Maine)

Our 26 year old son Scotty died suddenly on September 14th of the month,we were all so stunned, he had been using Heroin for over a year, we did not know he had a problem with that drug, that was just so shocking for us, he had kept so much from us about his life, he was also HIV positive, he is our third born of four, I am just so sad and angry, that one bad choice, took his life, just so crushing, I found him in his room, the pain is just so haunting to me, I would do anything to have him back, I know that will not happen, his best friend told us he had the issue with Heroin for over year, that is what hurts the most, our lives are changed for ever, all we have of him are his ashes and memories we just love him so much, I only hope he knew that, still so fresh, I know it will take some time, we miss you Scotty, love your Mom.

Comments for Losing Scotty Rock

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Nov 20, 2013
so much more than the drugs that claim them
by: Anonymous

I am sorry for your loss and like you, lost my son to DO...he was not honest so the shock and secrecy is still hurting me. I thought he was doing well, but suspect one slip and he was gone. The last gesture when I saw him was a big hug and his last words to me by phone were Love you MOM, so there is comfort though suspicion he knew the tightrope he was walking while I did not know the whole truth. I too asked, why would anyone take that...he said his problems were from a prescription to addiction and after we found out what he used on his death certificate, we were shocked and angry at the deception but his fiancé explained about the cost of one drug to another on the street. I know he made a bad choice but he was so much more than that bad decision, a caring loving person who struggled to beat it and lost...and I miss him as I know you miss Scotty...I hope the care from others is comforting...Joe's mom

Nov 10, 2013
by: Anonymous

You are right he did make a choice to take Heroin, which cost him his life, he was HIV positive for six years,for the last year he stop taking the meds, not sure why, starting taking heroin for a year and half, still waiting for the final report to come back from the medical person for the autopsy, his heroin might have been laced, but we also found out he was also using cocaine,might have taking the heroin and cocaine together, still not sure, wont know for another couple of months, just very painful, he was so loved and cherished, I just hope he knew that, he was also a human being with a very caring heart

Nov 05, 2013
your Scotty
by: Jolynn

He was a handsome young man. The illness of addiction is baffling. My son died of a Heroin overdose 1 year ago. Had so much life and energy he was a Lt. officer in the Marines. They taught him to be tough. He was training to fly fighter jets. He had his pilots license and was on his way to a brilliant future but got waylaid by drugs. Why did he have to use something so strong as Heroin? Part of the reason is cost. Heroin is 5$ a bag whereas oxycontin is $80.00 a pill. He said he loved the feeling Heroin gave him. He promised me he wouldn't die. It's been a year and I miss him so terribly. There is a gapping hole in our family. Holidays are sad now. I hope we do see our children again. We have bonds that don't break with death. Your son chose to use this drug so do not feel guilty. We had good young men who played with fire and it cost then their life.
I am so sorry for your loss. He sounds like such a wonderful young man.

Nov 04, 2013
by: Angry at insensitivity

When my son died also of a heroin overdose I dared anyone to judge him. We don't judge people who climb mountains, fight for causes that have questionable moral grounds, drive racing cars or those who die from cancer because they have eaten meat or sat too long in the sun or even those who smoke and we certainly don't say to a grieving relative that their son had choices.
Your loss of your wonderful son has broken your heart and my thoughts are with you.

Oct 08, 2013
by: Anonymous

im sorry for your loss, but your son had a choice and he never took it HIV meds can keep the virus at bay and he could of lived a normal life, its such a shame this drug got hold of him and he could not see his future. I get so angry after watching my wife fight for life with cancer when other commit suicide, what my wife could of done for that life. I know if you knew what he was doing you would of helped him. once again im sorry

Oct 03, 2013
the pain is unbearabe-NJ
by: Anonymous

I am so sorry for your loss of your beautiful son....I too lost my 21 year old son to a heroin overdose last year. All i can tell you is the pain never goes away, but will get lighter to handle and we are in constant wonder as to how we went wrong, why didn't we see sooner...etc. I don't know why these things had to happen to our children, but they did. I never allow the addiction to define who my son was and I ask you do the same.... Choosing to go on and to still keep Scotty in your heart and life will not be an easy road, but I know he will help you to endure it somehow. Addiction in this country is a serious epidemic and there are so many ignorant people in this world that can't see that. This is why so many people are dying from addiction. I have chosen to go out and publicly speak even though it takes the life out of me every time I have to tell my son's story. I pray that in time you have the strength to endure the life that is to come.

Sep 30, 2013
Losing Scotty
by: Anonymous

I also lost my son to a heroin overdose, five months ago. I still cry and wonder how we lost him. Why did it have to happen? Why did he have to do heroin? Why couldn't he have gotten better? So many what if's. I loved him so much, and although he probably struggled for a while, if asked, he always said he was doing good. He did want to beat it. But I guess its harder than we can imagine. Its like a crap shoot, and they never know when a dose of heroin may be their last. I'm so sorry for your loss, and I know how you feel. We just want to turn back time....

Sep 28, 2013
Your son
by: Kate

I am so sorry that you know the depth of this devestating pain.
Losing your son is unbelievable! I lost my son at 39 years old and he had drank and taken cocaine ,a deadly combination that not many know can stop your heart. My son was a drinker but did not use drugs on a regular basis. A friend offered him coke to feel better from his depression. It took him away from us. It is 10 months and I am still numb. I understand your feelings. Being on here has helped me write and express my loss. There are no answers,but on here we care and understand.

Sep 28, 2013
Losing Scotty Rock
by: Doreen UK

Cindi I am sorry for your loss of your son Scotty to Heroin. Sadly the drug culture is with us and more and more of young people are being held captive by such a lifestyle. The parents go through hell waiting and watching their young men and women grow up and then die from a lifestyle choice that they thought would help them cope with the harshness of life. It is the addiction that is hard for many to cope with. just look at the celebrities that failed to overcome their drug habit and got in deeper that claimed their life and left the world sad for their loss. Drugs are no respecter of persons. It will be harder for you because you did not know your son was on heroin. Parents rear their children to live independent lives and hope they make the right choices in life. But often it is because they got caught up with the wrong crowd or peer pressure. My nephew was put on prescription drugs for depression and the side effects were suicidal tendencies. He threw himself in front of an express train 7 yrs. ago. 30yrs. of age. A life lost forever. I am sorry for your loss.

Sep 28, 2013
my son died DO as well
by: Anonymous

Dear Cyndi.
I know how your feel that was mine as well as more
than a year my son was gone by DO which I never knew, he was nice looking work as personal training had a good look body good manor, a lot people liked him and he behaved as a gentleman as no one know he was using drug, I did not why and how he get in that evil, I just blame myself why I trusted him so much and had no attention to him
more until that day police came my house and my life have changed since, I've still angry and regret sometime why GOD let my son get in that path, why he did not give me a chance to save him
as now i still miss him, I cry and talk to his picture what could calm me down, but I realized that is his karma he is done his mission with this world and came back home waiting another mission, I pray GOD give him better life in next
so I have to go on for my husband and daughter
we have to continue whatever life GoD give us but still I always love him and never forget until we meet again. I hope you too Cyndi you have to go on for the rest ur family love him in your heart
and pray for him no more this mistake, life is challenge all of us come here for learning we make mistake we'll gone and come back again and learn again and again..again, i hope you feel better that you are not alone

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