Loss of Hope

by Sally
(Cornwall)

By comparison mine seems insignificant to the tradegies that have been told here.
I have, was!, been with my boyfriend for 8 months, during that time we shared many good times, and not even one cross word. We went away for a week in November and when we came back he just never went home and decided to put his house on the market. We involved ourselves with each others lives, friends, family, hobbies. I never asked him to move in, but didnt object. He receved and accpeted an offer on his house, he signed and took the paperwork to the solicitors on the same day that he received it, Friday 15th February. At the weekend we were building a bbq in the garden, dicussing where his furniture was going, discussing what car he woudl buy next so we had two practicle cars, talking about a holiday in October . . . And then he left Sunday night, saying that he wasnt cut out for a relationship. He collected his things Monday morning, told me he loved me when he left. Told me that if he saw me in the street he would always think what had he given up as i am gorgeous and wonderful.
In the early days he did tell me that he wasnt good at relationships, I never pushed him or asked him for anything knowing this and didnt want to give him any pressure.
Sunday was such a huge shock, and I dont know how to get over this. I feel very lost, lonely and sad, I am grieving for what I have lost.
I am 40 years old with no children, I guess I am saying that i am greving for the hope I had of having my fairy tale.

Comments for Loss of Hope

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Feb 21, 2013
Loss of Hope
by: Doreen U.K.

Sally it just doesn't seem possible that someone could be so cruel and not think about you and your feelings. He could have given you the time and space to discuss things. Perhaps he was more infatuated with you and your beauty and realised that his feelings are only on the surface. Otherwise how could he not discuss this. Why walk away? with no thought for you and your feelings. You will go through the preliminary stages of the loss of a relationship that you thought was going somewhere and which could have gotten better. You were Happy and filled with HOPE. A Hope that has now been lost due to his careless handling of the relationship. You are a mature woman and will realise that this man was not the real thing. It hurts. There is nothing worse than loving someone and they don't return this love. They walk away. This man probably doesn't know what he wants out of life. He tried a relationship and probably got cold feet and so wouldn't and couldn't make a commitment to you. If you are struggling. See a grief counsellor in order to get this grief out of your system. You will then be in a better position to find out through counselling the WHY DID THIS HAPPEN? You need the confidence to get back into the dating game and find someone who will commit to you and love you for who you are. Don't give up! When Mr. Right comes along you will look back and see how much better you are for having someone who can give and receive your love. I am sorry for your loss.

Feb 20, 2013
too hard to understand
by: jamie

...but I understand how you may feel. My experience was not quite the same. My husband of only 2 years had a very long severe surgery and never quite recovered. His personality changed so much over a short few months that no one recognized him anymore. He left... walked out on me and his son and his family. I couldn't be mad for long because he was being honest to who he was right then and there... I see him from time to time and miss him, and i miss him.

I wonder why. I suppose you do too. It's been several years now and have adjusted. Still... it is so mysterious.

You obviously have a good heart. And who knows what good may come out of sharing it like you did.

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