loss of husband 6 months ago update

by MaryAnne

It will be 6 months since I lost my husband on May 22nd. I am still missing him and still feel the same intense love for him. I am very busy with work at the hospital and here at the complex.

I am sorry my husband will not share in the joy of my becoming a great grandmother around Nov.
Something very strange has happened and I am not sure what to make of it. To begin with, we have some things happen here at my home such as my husband's cologne and ''grandpa's chair'' rocking by itself. My grandchildren do not worry as they feel that grandpa is just watching them from heaven.

I was cleaning and painting a unit to rent out and after 2 weeks it was ready. I went in to touch up the baseboards. I was not thinking of my husband at the time, as I wanted to just finish up. I covered the rug and got down on the floor and got started with the painting. Suddenly my husband came into my mind very strong and I felt his presence and he was watching me paint.He was right beside me. I continued painting very aware that he was watching. I was not afraid. The feeling went away when I went to the back rooms.

I wondered later why he went there instead of our unit but he used to manage that unit so maybe that is why. It sure is mysterious to me because nothing like that happened before.

At any rate I prayed about it. There is a reason for everything. I did ask God to forgive me for being mad at him because he refused go to the doctor until the last 2 months and it was already too late. So the Lord lifted that from my heart.
He will always be my love, the love of my life.

Comments for loss of husband 6 months ago update

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May 17, 2010
Sudden Death
by: Anonymous

I just lost my husband of 17 years of marriage and we are both 45. I'm completely devastated and sometimes don't feel I can bear it. We have a 17 yr. young son together and two grown step children. In fact, my husband's long lost son, who's 29, has just joined the family. Now that's bitter sweet. Sometimes I feel like I'm going to have a panic attack, and other times I want to pull out my hair and scream. This is my first day back at work.

May 17, 2010
for down under
by: MaryAnne

I was pleased to read your message. I talked to the grief pastor tonight that the funeral home had sent and he said my experience in the unit was a God thing. He hears this sort of thing all the time as his function is to be there for people who are grieving.

Thank you for your comforting words. Life has to go on. I think of how happy my husband would be with a great grandchild coming around Christmas time.

My 15 month granddaughter Desiree still remembers him and that amazes me after 6 months. She found a picture of him and said,''Pompa''.

I miss my husband but am glad he is not suffering from that awful heart condition anymore. It is really good that I am working 2 jobs and am busy. God has blessed me with a whole lot of people to comfort me both here and at work. My tenants are like family to me. So I make sure I am there for them too.

Anyway you take care and be sure to keep posting whatever is on your mind and heart.

May 17, 2010
I also lost my husband
by: Helen

I lost my husband June 30, 2009 and it still feels like yesterday. Sometimes I think I feel him around me, but then I wonder if I am going crazy or do I just want to believe that he is really watching over me. He was always so good with computers (programing) and helped me out a lot. My boss asked me to design/program a database for him, and I did, I want to believe that my husband was helping me with this assignment, I was never that good in programing but the database came out beautifully. I don?t know if it was sink or swim, or did he really watch over me.

My husband also went to the doctor too late, and I feel so guilty about it. I feel that I should have taken better care of him, I should have made him go to the doctor regularly.

I guess I am at a different stage of the grieving process, because I am still trying the understand ?there is a reason for everything? deal. I'm still very consumed with guilt.

May 15, 2010
For down under
by: MaryAnne

Thank you so much for your kind words. Your message meant a lot to me. I feel that you are right about what you said, and that he is watching over me. It was not unusual for him to watch me paint and he always admired my work. We were always doing something here, but my painting skills amazed him and I would get big hugs from him out of the deal.

You know that God has a way of comforting us and bringing us through so much. We may feel we cannot take it. There is a song. ''God will make a way.'' And he does.

My granddaughter and I have some flowers to place on the grave. I am so thankful for all these grandchildren who help me make it through.
I am also thankful for this board and people like you who care. May God bless you always.

May 14, 2010
Angel Souls
by: Down Under

Mary-Anne, it seems you have allowed yourself to feel his presence and he too is ready to let you know that you are not alone. Don't be afraid, take it all in and be happy, not too many people have the opportunity of having their loved ones close again when they pass. Warm wishes heading your way.

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