Loss of my Best Friend

by Lisa
(Garland Texas)

I lost my best friend on Jan 31,2010. We met in Sept of 2008 and we instantly fell in love. We both had bad marriages and we finally found each other. Kevin made me feel loved and warm and secure.

I had made a promise to myself that I would never fall in love again after a bad 27 year marriage. But after meeting Kevin and letting him into my heart, I knew what real love was like. He would write poems and email them to me at work. He would have romantic dinners ready for me when I got home. And countless nights of holding each other and falling asleep.

But on Jan 8, 2010 he got up with a bruise on the calf of his right leg and it is was swollen twice the size it should be. We took him to the hospital and they said he had a blood vein to bust.

Kevin needed a liver transplant and his blood wasn't clotting; they did surgery on his leg on that Sunday and he was doing good until that Thursday and he got pneumonia and ended up in ICU.

Then on Jan 30, 2010 we took him off the ventilator and he lasted 5 hours and he died twice before he finally went to be with the Lord.

I have never had such pain in all of my life. I have lost both of my parents and that grief is nothing compared to what I am going through now.

I come home from work and he isn't there. Going to bed at night is the hardest of them all. And Valentine's day we were suppose to have been married. So it has been real hard the past couple of weeks. I just don't know how to go on without him in my life.

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Mar 13, 2010
When Death Comes Unexpectedly
by: Anonymous

Lisa, I also lost my best friend and husband on 12/23/09 although the death cert says 12/24/09. It was unexpected. If it hadn't been for my little dog to wake me up in the middle of the night, when my husband was leaning on a piece of furniture and calling my name softly, I would never have been able to see him go from a sudden and unexpected cardiac arrest.

My wound is still raw at times and I can fully understand what you are going through. The emptiness and the voidness of it all is sometimes unbearable. But I can only take one baby step at a time, a second at a time, a minute at a time.

When it gets unbearable, I just take big breaths to keep me going. I do not resort to alcohol or to drugs. The only time I took some sleeping pills was when my friend gave me some to help me. Now, if I can't sleep, I take warm milk. Two months after his death, I lost my job, so it's cope after another cope for me. Take care, K

Mar 08, 2010
Expressing Sympathy
by: Texas

Lisa, I am so sorry for your loss. It is so fresh, I bet you know the exact number of days he has been gone. First I counted by days, then weeks, then months and it will be a year on April 6th. It feels like a broken heart could not possibly keep beating, yet, it does. Hold his love close, your memories closer.

You have come to a good resource, I went through many until I found this one. You may feel alone but you are not; keep reaching out and take the grief on your own time. Be selfish. I will pray for you. Please know time really does help ease the pain a bit. I use to call everyone liars for telling me time would heal my wound. It doesn't heal, just eases...God Bless You

Feb 28, 2010
Soul Mate
by: Donw Under

Lisa, my condolences on the loss of your soulmate Kevin. You have been one of the lucky ones to have met someone so beautiful. Cherish the times you had together and have those wonderful moments get you through the tough times ahead. One day you will again be reunited, but until then keep his memories alive and in your heart.

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