Loss of my big brother
I lost my big brother almost 7 months ago to muscular dystrophy. I got to say my goodbyes and felt at peace. Unfortunately I live in the Middle East so had to return from home in Ireland after 2 weeks. For the first 5 months I was fine and then it hit me like a bolt of lightening. I didn't understand what was happening and thought I was going crazy. I then worked out that it was grief and it is truly crippling. The pain is unbearable to the point I can't cry and suffer from bad anxiety. In the last few weeks it's all been coming out and I've been sobbing uncontrollably. Have been seeing a counsellor for the anxiety but just need some reassurance that in time this does get better. The good news is that I go back home in 10 weeks for good. Everyone else seems to be doing fine. Maybe it's because I'm out here with too much time to think and no family support. My husband can't seem to understand and is of little help to me. I just feel so frightened.