loss of my husband 4 and half years ago

by Veronica
(England)

Do you ever get over the lose of your spouse. He died while we were on holiday in the Maldives. Everything seems to move on, but you never really do. I have now retired but life is so lonely without him. I expected to retire with my husband after working for so many years, but it was not to be. The only way I can describe it is its like my life is not real and I keep expecting it to be a dream and I will wake up and things will be the same as they were before. Is this a common factor in sudden death, I ask myself.

Comments for loss of my husband 4 and half years ago

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Aug 31, 2011
Loss of a Spouse
by: Anonymous

Hi Everyone

I would just like to say thanks to the people who responded to my comment. I know it is very difficult for anyone who has lost someone close to them, but with your spouse you lose your whole lifestyle and that is something that you can never regain. My thoughts are with all you bereaved out there.

Aug 24, 2011
The Love Never Dies
by: Anonymous

Veronica~
I am only 9 months into this ugly journey. I never thought my husband would die and leave me here without him. We were married for 37 years. I just seem to drifting through the days, no focus, no hope for the future. I wake up in the morning ~ just exist ~ actually look forward to bedtime so I can get some peace while I sleep for 4-5 hours.
I try to move forward but the thought of moving forward on my own just does not appeal to me.
I miss my husband so much. My life without him seems so meaningless right now.
I pray every day for God to ease this suffering and take me where he wants me to go. I'm stuck. Stuck in grief. I know it's up to me to move on but I just can't get the motivation to do so.
I pray for you, for me and all the others grieving on our web site.
All we can do is the best we can. Blessings to you.

Aug 24, 2011
Trying to live without them
by: Anonymous

Veronica,

I am not sure we ever "get over" our loves death. I think that we exist after they die, mostly in some surreal type of existence .
Even when we try our best to make a life for ourselves the memories will come to mind and make an o.k day even a good day dark, bringing us back once again to the grief that we try to escape from.

Seeing couples eating together, laughing, embracing each other. The look of Love in their eyes I once had. It no longer angers me, I am happy for them. Maybe they have the Love I once did. I hope that they do not squander that love. I hope that they cherish that love.

But there are times when I must excuse myself and put my head into my hands and try to get myself together and go on with the life that I am meant to live. We are meant to find joy still as impossible as it seems. But I do not think that we will ever stop missing or loving them. There are days still that it seems so very hard. I push myself to do things that I have not done, to face things that scare me to face life head on as if it were my last days because we need to take the time that we have and make something of it.

They would want it, and we deserve it...
HH

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