Lost Love...By Laura

by Laura
(Phoenix, AZ)

I am a widow of 1 year. I lost my Husband April 15, 2011. He was very sick and his illnesses got the best of him. We never had any kids but had been together since I was 16. I miss him so much. I often think about him and wish I could see him or even just lay with him. My heart seem to be extremely heavy these days. I am faced with trying to move forward with my life but at times find it difficult. I been staying with my best friend since July of 2011 because I could not afford to live in our house any more the bills and rent was to much for me. I feel like a let down to him because I often think of what we had together and what I am faced with now and just can believe my life has come to a stand still. I have found comfort in knowing the lord and taking it to him in prayer but at times that just don't seem like its enough. I am very heart broken over his lost. Truly feel lost in life now!

Comments for Lost Love...By Laura

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May 30, 2012
by: Laura

Hi everyone although this journey in loosing my husband of 14 years has been rough, I do feel blessed because I have someone in my life that loved me enough to stay by my side through it all. All though the road gets rough at times my friend is always there to help me keep it together and to know that just because we live on and our loved ones are gone doesn't me that we forget about them or just get over it! We will always have the memories of our lost love but knowing how great the love was is enough to know that they would want nothing but the best for us. We have good days, bad days and days that seem as if they go on forever but at the end of it all we remember their smile or their voice and it makes it all better.

May our days be filled with each others strength, love and memories.
Remember when the time is right we will all love again and find it easier to breath! Blessing to all.

May 29, 2012
feeling your pain
by: Anonymous

Dear Laura, It is almost a year since I lost my husband. It is so hard getting used to a whole new life. I am currently trying to sell my house, and in this market it is not easy. When you first lose your spouse, you just think of how much you miss him. Then reality sets in and you think of all the things you have to do without his help. Some days I just feel so overwhelmed. When I feel this way, I sit down and have a good cry and then figure out where I go from here. So far I have not been doing so bad. I think we are all stronger than we think. Wishing you the strength to get through this. We on this website are here to help each other. Joanne, Chicago

May 22, 2012
Sad Days
by: Laura

As this month comes to an end I find it harder to breath! It seems like my every thought is my husband and what could have been. God I miss him so much! My heart is so heavy. I have some chooses to make and just wish he was here if he was then I would not even be faced with all this. Very sad days...

May 20, 2012
How do we go on ?
by: Alan

Hi Laura, I lost my beautiful wife Donna on December 8, 2011. This June 4 is our 35th anniversary. Like you, we had no children.
I have no answers for you, most days I take it a minute at a time.
May we all be given the strength to continue.

May 17, 2012
Thank you
by: Laura

Thank you ladies..it is so good to know that I am not alone with my feelings and more importantly I am not going crazy. I send many blessings and prayers up for you both. God bless.

May 11, 2012
I understand..
by: Daffy

Dear Laura, I understand, I really do. My husband passed only a couple of months ago, and like you we had no children, and we too had been together since I was 16. I too lost him to illness.

It is hard, and outsiders expect you to move on. Your post brought tears to my eyes because I know your pain. I know how it is the little, almost insignificant every day things that you miss. The things that only you and your husband shared in your life together. As you said, the simple act of lying beside him, holding his hand and sharing the day to day trivia. The sound of his voice, and his laugh, the way he says your name. I miss it all so much too.

I've only just found this site, and it is comforting to know that there are others out there who understand - even if we all didn't want to find ourselves here. I send you love and a big hug:)

May 11, 2012
April 15, 2011
by: Julie

Laura, I can identify with the pain that you are feeling as I too lost my love, my life on April 15, 2011. This has to be "THE" worst day in my life. He also was sick with numerous health issues, the last four years being the worst. We were together for 43 years. I was 18 when we got married. We do have two great sons and five beautiful grandchildren and I thank God everyday for each of them. They seem to be able to cope and their lives are busy. Again I'm thankful for this. Me on the other hand, am still a basket case. It's difficult to find my place in this nightmare of my life. Still having crying fits and just seemed consumed in the lonliness that has taken over. If it wasn't for God and His nuturing care, I couldn't make it on this journey. Arthur and I were finally able to sit back and enjoy each other and to know that we were comfortable in our situation. Like you it is now very difficult to run day to day finances. But there again, God has lovingly carried me thru this area too. I guess that my biggest battles are lonliness, purpose of life and the will to go on daily. I have begged God to direct my path from here but I seem to be missing His answer. Maybe I just need more time in God's "waiting room" to be able to hear and accept His response. So for right now, I just lean on God and let Him carry me. I will always love and miss Arthur. I cling to the promise that one day "WE" will be together again. Right now though I would just love to be in his loving arms and to hear him say "Everything's gonna be ok and I love you" and to be able to say it back to him. But until that day, I'll just try to live my life and try to make God and Arthur proud of my efforts and believe me it's a daily struggle. I pray that God will comfort you and blanket you with His love and grace.

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