Lost my Dad Suddenly From Heart Attack

by Amber

I'm 22 years old and lost my dad on May 14th, 2014 to a sudden heart attack. He was only 57 years old. His death left my 54 year old Mom a widow. My dad was the seemingly healthy one and when I got the life altering phone call at 10:45 pm on that day, I thought I heard wrong when they said, "your father passed away this evening". I didn't sleep that entire night and felt completely helpless since my husband and I moved to Malibu, California for him to attend the University, and all of my family was back home in Washington state. I wanted to be home RIGHT then, to instantly be with my mom...but instead I had to wait until 7 in the morning for our flight that we booked immediately to go home.
My dad was my best friend and the #1 guy in my life for 20 years of my life. Then I got married and thank God he was still alive then to see me get married, to walk me down the aisle and to give me away. I know it made him sad though and that him and my mom missed me so much when we moved to California. The longest I had ever been away from my parents was for 2 weeks, so it was a huge change for all of us.
The fact that I moved away during his last year of life just haunts me and makes me feel so guilty. I wish I would have been home so that I would have been seeing him weekly like I used to. The last time I saw him was for Christmas this last year. My husband and I had a trip booked to go home to Washington on June 11th already...I would have been seeing my dad in about 4 weeks...but then he died. I was so close to seeing him again...that haunts me too. :(
I've never felt a pain like this and I wish I wasn't going through it. But I am. If anyone is a believer out there, please say a quick prayer for me. I really need it in this time.

Thank you.

Comments for Lost my Dad Suddenly From Heart Attack

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Jun 06, 2014
So sorry about your dad
by: Luis

I am very sorry about your dad's passing, he sounds like a extremely caring father and a good person. My dad passed away 4 days ago and the empty feeling is so hard, I can not stop thinking of him and worrying about him. I hope that you are feeling better.

Jun 03, 2014
Lost my Dad Suddenly From a Heart Attack
by: Doreen UK

Amber I am sorry for your loss of your father almost 3 weeks ago. Too soon to feel anything but RAW PAINFUL GRIEF. None of us on this site were prepared for what this pain feels like. Even though we all have different life histories and relationship/bonds with the one's we lost, we can all identify and relate to the pain of grief as being the same for all of us, as we all describe how it feels, MORE THAN UNBEARABLE PAIN. We will never quite get over our loss EVER.
People move countries and state's all the time for various reasons.
My 2 sisters live in Canada and Australia for 46yrs. each. If they had stayed at home they would have lost out on 35yrs. of living when our mother died. Our father is 93yrs. and still alive. A lifetime of opportunity missed had they stayed at home. Emigrating to Canada we stayed a year and came back to the U.K. I have no regrets. My husband died 2yrs. ago of cancer and I feel more settled here in the U.K. My husband suddenly felt the distance from his family so made the decision to come back to the U.K. One never knows where life will take them, but most people move because of job/work opportunities. Sad that life is like this causing more families to be separated and miss being together. Returning to the U.K. meant that we lived further away from the relatives here. But we managed to move back many years later. I decided to go and live 2 doors away from my mom and dad, to look after them in their old age, then my mother being over 60yrs. decided to move home and live in Scotland where I was born. My mother then died 11yrs. ago but I was not as accessible to her to see her more often and I would have cared for my father living 2 doors away but he had to move also and is now in a care home where my youngest sister is living. People move away all the time for different reasons. The absence is felt more after we lose a close loved one and regret sets in.
I feel very sad for your mother losing her husband, and at such a young age. I am still struggling with my loss 2yrs. later. I hope that you all as a family can be close and supportive to each other as much as is possible to help the healing process. Life is too short to be apart.

Jun 02, 2014
Dear Amber,
by: Anonymous

I lost my father suddenly as well. He died last year from Cardiac Arrest and my phone call came at 10:19 am. I was with him the day before at my son's basketball game and everything was fine. At times I think I am still in shock. He was an energetic, healthy, "young" 81 year old man. People have told me that "at least he made it to 81", but that doesn't matter. It was still too soon, and I never said goodbye. So, I understand completely how you feel. It sounds like you had the same kind of relationship with your father that I had with mine. I am 48 years old, and I am thankful that he saw me graduate college, get married and have children - but we still had so much more to experience together. My pain will never go away, but it has gotten a bit easier over time. I do have the wonderful memories of him, and they comfort me so much. I feel him with me at times, and I talk to him a lot. I also take comfort knowing that my father didn't suffer - it was all over very quickly. I can tell you that this website has been a great source of comfort for me, and I hope you will find the same. Grief is a long, hard and sad journey, but having people who understand helps you along the way. You will be in my thoughts, Barb

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