Lost my husband on June 30, 2009, it feels like yesterday
I lost my husband June 30, 2009, and it still feels like yesterday. Sometimes I think I feel him around me, but then I wonder if I am going crazy or do I just want to believe that he is really watching over me. He was always so good with computers (programing) and helped me out a lot. My boss asked me to design/program a database for him, and I did, I want to believe that my husband was helping me with this assignment, I was never that good in programing but the database came out beautifully. I don’t know if it was sink or swim, or did he really watch over me.
My husband also went to the doctor too late, and I feel so guilty about it. I feel that I should have taken better care of him, I should have made him go to the doctor regularly.
I guess I am at a different stage of the grieving process, because I am still trying under understand “there is a reason for everything” deal. I still very consumed with guilt.