Lost my mom at 15 to pancreatic cancer

by Rachel
(Tennessee )

I'm 16 now, but I lost my mom when I was 15 to pancreatic cancer. It was and still is the hardest thing ever. I remember coming home on October 15, 2013 to a lot of family in my living room and my mom on the couch. I knew something was wrong because everyone looked upset and my brother had come home from ND. So I sat by my mom, and then my aunt told me that they went to the doctors and they found out that my mom had pancreatic cancer and that it was terminal. Everyone started crying except me. I just couldn't. I was in shock and I still am 9 months later. I just couldn't grasp the fact that my mom was going to die before I even turned 16. Now let's skip to November. My brother and I cared for my mom for about 2 weeks and then it happened. November 1, 2013. She left me. It was a Friday and it was about 12 am. I was trying to go to sleep and then my dad woke me up and told me that mom wasn't doing well and that I needed to come say goodbye because it wouldn't be long before she was gone. So I got up and went into her room and told everyone to leave. I was by myself and I just told her everything I wanted to tell her. I cried and begged God not to take her. I told her I loved her and she said "I love you too sweetheart." I started crying even more because she always called me sweetheart. Then everyone came back in and my brother told her it was okay to let go. Then it was my turn, I didn't want to say it but she was suffering so I told her it was okay to let go. My aunt then played the song "Let Her Go" by Passenger and we all just say there near her and then at about 1:07 am, God took my mom home to Heaven...

Comments for Lost my mom at 15 to pancreatic cancer

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Aug 31, 2014
I can relate
by: Kim Campbell


On June 24,2014 was my birthday. My twin brother took my mom to the ER that day. I was then told over the phone that she had pancreatic cancer and she had 3 to 6 months to live. She also had lung and kidney cancer as well. I was shocked and couldn't believe it was true. My mother and were best friends. She stayed in the hospital for two weeks trying to get the pain under control. When she came home she was on and wouldn't eat much of anything. I went home every weekend to take care of her as I always did growing up.

Two weeks after she was home we went back to see her oncologist on Tuesday July 16th she then told us three months. We called in hospices to come to the house on that following Saturday. July 18th I came to move in with her to take care of her. We started talking and crying 30 minutes later she was in an ambulance and headed back to the ER. Once she arrived she couldn't talk,..somewhere in that 10 minute drive something happened. I called my other 4 brothers and sisters and told then mom had about 24 hours to live.

We went from 3 months to 4 days of her death. I know you are a lot younger than me but I can tell you this.. Keep your good memories, write them down in a journal so you will always have them. People tell me they understand but everyone is different when we grieve. My mind is still in shock and so is my heart.

Keep your family close to you especially your dad and brother.
All of you are grieving probably in different ways, be patience with each other, lean on each other and know that your mom will always be with you because she gave birth to you. You are your mom in many ways and you will see that as you get older.
Cry when you want too, don't keep it inside because eventually you won't be able to handle it. Talk to friends, family and God...they will carry you through all the years to come.

I hope this has helped in someway.. I'll be praying for you,

Aug 28, 2014
Lost my mom at 15 to pancreatic cancer
by: Sob

Dear Rachel,

I am so sorry for your loss. Your post brought tears to my eyes. I know how it must have felt. I saw my mother take her last breath in front of my eyes and that memory still haunts me, even after more than two years. I wish I could hug you tight and let you cry/talk. Only those who have lost their mothers can know you awfully painful it is to lose someone who meant the world to us. Like you,I too lost my mother to cancer, one week after my 24th birthday. And we were as close as any mother and daughter could be. I still can't believe she is gone and I will have to live my whole life with out her.

Sweety, just take one day at a time. You are still very young and nothing can ever fill the gap left behind her. A daughter will always need her mother. No love can come close to a mother's love. She is not with you physically but she will always remain in your heart. You are her daughter and now the world will know her through you. Don't let your grief change who you are. Don't rush yourself through anything. Do things that she would have wanted you to do. That will bring peace to you, knowing that you did something that would have made her happy and proud. Life never stops, it goes on no matter how much you don't want it to. Of course you will miss her, but with time the pain will lessen. Go out for a walk, even if you don't feel like going. Try therapy if nothing else works.

Lots of hugs and love. Take care.

Aug 27, 2014
Thank you for the kind words
by: Rachel

Your kind words and advice definitely make me feel better. The way you type sounds exactly like my mom. I truly appreciate your kind words. I'm also very sorry for your losses. Keep looking up.

Aug 26, 2014
Loss of your mom
by: TAI

I am so sorry for your loss and your pain. there is no love quite like the love shared by a mom and her daughter.
I lost my mom in dec,2008, she was elderly and was ill. I too was there with her but she wasn't alert, so I couldn't talk to her. i sat in a chair at her feet, while my dad( stepdad)said goodbye and held her hand, after i had kissed her forehead and whispered i love you.
if she had any way of knowing where i was she knew why I was at her feet. It was the same reason the woman washed jesus's feet with her hair and perfume.
She was my hero and I still miss her.

Your always going to miss your mom. It will hurt just as much, just with time not as often.
She would want you to do well in life and be happy. I know this cause I am also a mom.
So remember her love, the quiet unspoken connection that only a mother and daughter have. Do what would make her proud and happy for you.

I believe she's in heaven watching.
But even if you don't believe, honor her memory and you will live better for it.
She can't be here to guide you so you'll have to ask yourself, what would my mom say?

I Lost my father at a young age too so I understand how lost you must feel.
It's ok to cry, scream, or whatever. Grieving takes time sometimes a very long time. read some of the posts on here, they may help you know that your not alone and that people understand your suffering.

get support from your family and friends, it's important not to be alone too much.

I'll say a prayer for you, your so young,my heart is so sad for you.
as a mom I just want to hug you and tell you your gonna be ok.

I just lost my oldest son in Jan. i can't hug or help him anymore. So I guess i'm just giving motherly advice.

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