Lost my son to a blood clot in the lungs

by Janet Achan
(Kissimmee, Florida)

I lost my 26 year old son, my friend and companion 2 days after mother's day on May 13 2014.
His autopsy show he pass from a blood clot in the lungs. He didn't have any injury. He was healthy and went to the gym almost everyday. He was the last person I would think anything can happen to.
I miss our talks and his wisdom. If it weren't for him I would not have advance in my life as I lost my husband also when he was 37.
I always look forward to cook for him and make him his favorite meal.
He was my shopping buddy and we attended church together.
He was very spiritual and pray more than I did. I keep telling myself
God has a bigger purpose for him.
A part of me is gone, I remember his younger days taking him to school,
helping him with his homework, teaching him to swim, taught him to drive.
He finally got a job that was secured and his vacation was coming up which he planned to go to Miami Beach. He was ready to take on life
and move to his own apt. I had packed dished and got furniture
so he was all set when he move. We even planned to go on a cruise
for my birthday this year.
Everything just crumbled when he passed.
You never know what life throw at you. But I keep
praying and one will see him again.
I love and miss you so much William.

Comments for Lost my son to a blood clot in the lungs

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Aug 27, 2014
Losing a child to blood clots
by: Doreen UK

Dear Everyone,
Who has lost a child to blood clots. I am so desperately sorry for your loss and what you have gone through in your grief which will last a long time.
This was brought close to home yesterday. I have had 2 weeks of sheer pain and terror in gasping for air and not being able to breathe. One of the worst medical experiences for me. I have spent 2 long days in A&E for 2 weeks. Monday kept in hospital for suspect clots on the lungs due to breathing difficulties. I had low oxygen levels worrying doctors. All my tests came back clear. BUT. My lungs are bad with (COPD). I have to spend hours at the hospital having lung function tests to see If I need Oxygen at home.
Blood clots kill and no one can ever determine how dangerous this condition is and how quick acting can save lives. This was my husbands fear, of not being able to breathe. I know now what this feels like. A Scary place to be right now. I pray for God's comfort on everyone who is grieving a loss.

Aug 25, 2014
I lost my daughter to a blood -clot in the lung too
by: Mahlape

My only daughter also died suddenly on April 30, 2012. She was 33. She was my baby and she was my friend. I'm still feeling shattered. She too was healthy and strong and in the middle of fantastic plans for her life. I'm sorry to hear about your son and I pray for your healing and mine. May you find strength to live each day.

Jul 17, 2014
I miss my only Son
by: Anonymous

Janet you have been through so much. Losing your father, husband, and now your only Son. This is such a heavy burden. We look to our Males in our family as our Protector. I feel this more now having lost my husband. I am now the Protector. it is such a heavy burden to carry. God is Our Protector over all of us so this gives me a measure of comfort. Otherwise I would feel so insecure. I have to try hard to let God be my Security. Feeling we failed our loved one's or responsible in some way for things that happened is also an aspect of grief. BUT. When one knows they have failed. In time with God's Help you will be able to let go of whatever you feel you did wrong and FORGIVE YOURSELF! the way God holds nothing against us. God knows our human frailty and more so since He went to the cross for us. He knew we could not save ourselves. We needed His intervention to save us. Our finite minds cannot understand fully the ways of God and why He allowed our loved one's to die when we needed them so much. It is only in eternity we will know all the answers. Just knowing that we will see our Loved one's again fills our hearts with HOPE to carry one each day. The only way forward is ONE DAY AT A TIME. It has been 2yrs. I lost my husband and can only still TAKE ONE DAY AT A TIME. It took me 9yrs. to recover from losing my mother 11yrs. ago. It may take me a lot longer to Heal and Recover from losing my Husband. But I have to lean harder on God each day to carry me through this valley of grief. You have such a heavy burden you need to cast on to the Lord as often this battle is too strong for us. I am also a strong person. It is a Blessing as it helps me day to day. But I need the strength of God to go on each day. You have two daughter's you say. Pray over them each Day for God's Blessings and Protection over them for their safety. Us Mom's never know what we are protected from if we failed to Pray over our lives and the lives of our children/families each day. I have done the counseling years ago, so know full well about the therapists clock watching. Just when one gets into their therapy their time is up. I soldiered on. and it was the best investment I made in my life to do therapy. I got my life back in ways I had never known. May God come close to you and Comfort you with His Peace. Feel free to write back. My email is doreen_1948@hotmail.co.uk If you find it easier to reply for on going support.

Jul 17, 2014
I miss my only Son
by: Anonymous

Dear Doreen...I feel your pain and I'm deeply sorry for how your husband died. 15 years ago I watched and assisted with hospice help my father pass from prostate cancer that ravaged his bones. I sat with music by his side and administered morphine every 15 minutes. I thought that was the worse pain ever...losing my Son has been a daunting task for me. I am fortunate to have 2 older daughters and the youngest thinks her brother is just on vacation. I am trying to focus as you say....and that is tough as that is what makes me crazy with why....the photos the lost hugs the hopes of a family he so wanted. There are other issues of blame I cannot discuss now...but he was let down. He was a beautiful man. Thank you for sharing your story. He will be 30 September 5th. All I know is I'm struggling. Tried a therapist..they watch the clock. The only ones who understand are those I don't know...others run except for a few. I realize I have the daunting task to try to be me before my baby passed and to make others feel comfortable. It's so tough. Again....seeing how my Pop passed and how long I really really understand your pain. It's how to do you move forward....I know we all get a turn....I feel like I am being punished. I am a strong person...but that boy of mine was my baby and we were close. He told me the night before how much he loved me....I'm grateful for that. As a mom we are suppose to protect. I failed.

Jul 17, 2014
I miss my only Son
by: Doreen UK

Dear Anonymous
I am so sorry for your loss of your only Son. We always wonder if our loved one suffered before they died. This is a common feeling for all of us. This feeling assaults us when we are grieving, and we often don't know how to get rid of this feeling. FOCUS. He died in Peace probably in his sleep. For many of the best way to die. If you need to find out if your son suffered you can always ask a doctor for advice so as to make your grief easier and not prolong your agony of not knowing.
My husband died a painful death from a slow growing cancer over 40yrs. His body was ravaged by cancer and he said he always felt so weird inside unlike many other cancers. This alone made him unhappy and ruined the quality of his life. On the last day of his life he was in severe pain and had to wait 3hrs for a nurse to come in and give him pain relief medication. He suffered for 3yrs.39days and died 2yrs. ago. I had to watch his suffering and is so very hard to get out of my mind. I knew my husband suffered because I saw it. You didn't see your son suffer (if he did) but it would have been quick because he died within the space of 24hrs. This should give you a measure of comfort knowing he didn't suffer for months or years.

Jul 16, 2014
I miss my only Son
by: Anonymous

My Son was 27 when his Dad found him laying back on the bed with his feet on the floor. He was Blue. They sat cardiomyopathy .....he was fine before bed. He ate well. There was no call for help. How do I know if he suffered and was trying to call out. I am struggling. It has been 2 years. He also had a big cyst like warm to the touch sore on his calf. I begged him to let me take him to ER. He refused. Just heart broken

Jul 04, 2014
Thank you
by: Janet Achan

Thank you everyone for your prayers and comments.

My daughter said this song found her and it helped
me through my tears. It brought comfort William is in heaven away from the pain of life.


God Bless you and I thank God for the strength he is giving us for this sorrowful time.

Jul 02, 2014
Lost my son to a blood clot in his lungs
by: Doreen UK

Janet this is the worst experience of a mothers life to lose her adult son to a sudden death at such a young age. Many things don't make sense in life. I lost my husband of 44yrs to cancer 2yrs. ago and didn't think I would lose him till old age like his parents dying in their late 80's. But he died at 65yrs. Knowing God and his promise of eternal life should fill our life with HOPE. We who believe will see our loved one's again. But it is sad they cannot partake in life anymore and enjoy their favourite foods, TV. and career. What is worse is losing an adult child who didn't know God and this was the END. It is not the end when we die. It is the beginning of a life that is kept safe with God and will be raised up when Jesus comes back for us. Only the body dies, but the Spirit which is the life and breath (soul) is safe with God. Your Son's body died but not his soul. He is alive with God. Our lives are planned by God. But it is still a very painful and lonely life without our loved one's in it. We live and grow with each other and when they die they are missed eternally. May God bring you His Comfort and Peace from the loss of your son.

Jul 02, 2014
by: Anonymous

I lost my husband at 42 and twenty years later our son at 39. Both times were overwhelming. I am a survivor but it is not easy.....one day I pray death will stop. Rev21:3&4

Jul 02, 2014
So Sorry
by: Gale

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. It's just so overwhelming and unfortunate when we lose a loved one; particularly a child. I too lost my son this past June 9, 2014. I am beyond repair at this time - and I don't see me coming out of it any time soon.
Do you have other children? Family or friends? If so try to utilize any and all the support you can get -
I try to take it one day at a time though I have my moments where I look too far ahead; that's when I lose it.
God bless you and I'll keep you in my thoughts. Hugs to you - Gale

Jul 02, 2014
Your son
by: Kate

Oh my , I understand your loss. Your words ring true to me because I lost my son,my friend when he was 39. A year and a half has somehow gone by. My son was my shopping buddy too and we enjoyed each other,our love was deep. It is so hard,no one knows but a mother who has been there. I really don't have answers because I could find none as to why....but I do know your grief. So many are suffering from losing their child,it is heartbreaking for each one. It takes a huge piece of your heart out. I pray for holy help every day. How would I make it this far. My heart is with you in your painful path. We learn to face it as days keep coming ,it's never ok but we continue to live. His love will help you through.

Jul 01, 2014
I lost my son from a blood clot also
by: Carol, Sean's Mom

I also lost my son to a blood clot. He was 24. Sean was a good athlete and like your son went to the gym. Sean died November 15,2011. I am still struggling. I survive for his sisters but I am so heavy hearted now. I ask Why everyday. I am so sorry for your loss. Please know I understand.. It is so hard.

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