Lost our first baby
I was 11 weeks pregnant and was just going in for my dating ultrasound. We were so excited to find out when my actual due date would be. When we went there the ultrasound tech said she was nervous of some extra tissue she found and was going to get the doctor. When we talked to the doctor she was very straight forward and told us we should see a specialist as soon as possible. We were able to get into the specialist the next day. He confirmed what the doctor saw. So we were going to have a CVS done and of course that specialist didn't have a license to perform that kind of test so we had to go to another clinic. That specialist gave us even worse news!! He told us that the baby had cystic hygroma with fetal hydrops. The specialist said there was only a 2% chance that the baby would make it. My husband and I were devastated. They asked if we wanted to terminate the pregnancy and we said absolutely not since there was still a strong heartbeat and we were going to stay hopeful that the baby would survive. So we went in again for another ultrasound about 3 weeks later. They said the fluid was now surrounding the baby but there was still a strong heartbeat. So we had to wait another two weeks for another ultrasound. When we went to this ultrasound we knew something was wrong right away because she was taking the heartbeat and all of a sudden turned off the machine and said she had to get the doctor. The doctor came in did another ultrasound and confirmed that there was no heartbeat. We had to go back to my doctor's office across the hall to find out what will happen now. I thought I would have to get a DNC. Unfortunately since I was too far along I had to go to labor and delivery over night and they would have to induce labor. What a horrible experience that was for both of us. I had contractions like normal and had to actually deliver my baby who was no longer breathing. The nurses came in and asked us to pick out an outfit for the baby to wear, a hat, a stuffed animal for the baby to have next to them. We didn't even know the sex of the baby at this point because we wanted to find out when we had the baby so we didn't even have names picked out. She asked if we wanted a baptism for the baby and of course we did so we said yes to that. After about 9 hours of being in the hospital, I delivered our baby boy. We picked out a name for him that meant fighter since he fought his little heart out to live an extra 5 weeks. We were able to hold him and take pictures of him and with him. The nurses were so great to us.They made us a memorial box with the pajamas he wore, the stuffed animal, two dvds with puctures of him, his little feet and hand prints, a little angel that someone made, his hospital bands, a sweet poem, a hand knitted hat for us to keep. This has been the hardest time in our lives. We lost our baby that we love so much. Everytime I look at my belly I rub it and then remind myself that I'm no longer pregnant with him.