Lost Sonny my doggie soulmate

by Lori Light
(Rocky Hill CT USA)

I love you Sonny

I love you Sonny

My Sonny was an 8 year old Lab/Pit mix that was the doggie love of my life. He was by my side every chance he got and we loved it that way. I called him my little shadow and my mini me. He would howl (woo woo woo woo) with excitement everytime you came back in the apartment even if you were only in the laundry room for only ten minutes, and shower you with kisses galore.

I remember when we picked him up as a puppy like it was yesterday. They placed him in my arms and I squealed with delight awww ..... ohhhh he is so.... cute. I held him tight all the way home as he whimpered about being separated from his littermates and doggie mom. My husband thought of his name saying why don't we call him Sonny cause he is like our son and that was the greatest thing.

He truly was a sunny dog happy and smiling and wagging his whole body and giving kisses to anyone that would talk to him. He would greet all of our neighbors with the same excitement and exuberance he did us. He would woo woo woo woo as they walked towards him smiling and waggin his whole body until they came close enough that he could kiss them. He even made our neighbors who weren't fond of dogs laugh and smile with his woo woo woo and wagging.

He didn't like the usual games of balls and sticks but would rather you throw rocks, acorns, water or snowballs while counting one two, two two ....... three and he would chase them like crazy and bark at them and come back in anticipation wanting you to do it again jumping and barking and getting all excited for another round. We called this playing the choo choo game. I was actually getting tired of choo choo every day and am now sad that somedays I would get annoyed that this is all he would want to do and not walk because now I miss the choo choo game.

I remember being concerned before we got him that I wouldn't like him as I simply asked for a male puppy out of a liter of pit mixes that were being born and he was the only boy and the shelter picked out the dog you were getting so we never met him before the day we picked him up. I remember saying to my husband I hope I like him.

He couldn't have been a better match for our family if we tried. He just about trained himself he was so eager to please. He loved to cuddle and needed to be touching you every chance he had. He was by my side on the couch, at my feet on the bed and on the road with me every chance I got. He even got to come to my first dog grooming job with me. I would cover him with his little green blanket at night and "tuck him in" and then when I woke up I would roll over say "good morning pup pup" cover him with his blanket again and give him a kiss as I slithered out of bed.

His death was sudden, unexpected, tragic and traumatic for us. He had just had a physical and bloodwork that came out fine 8 days earlier. We were out in the field behind our apartment when he started looking like he didn't feel good- tail between his legs ears back like he wanted to vomit. He went in the bushes to go potty and I turned just in time to see him go completely stiff and fall over. I was about 15 feet away at this time and ran to him and called his name at which time he let out the most heart breaking moan and I yelled to my husband to come help something was seriously wrong. We began to carry him home and notice he was turning blue so hubby ran for the car and off to the emergency vet we went. We were in shock when they came out and told us it didn't look good and heart failure was most probable as he had no circulation in his body, they couldn't stabilize his vitals and he had multiple attacks where he kept going rigid and he couldn't breathe on his own. We had to put him to sleep he wouldn't have lasted the night and he was in a lot of pain.

We were nowhere near thinking about the loss of our baby and were looking forward to 3-5 more good years with him at least. We are left devastated and broken. My heart is torn and I cry uncontrollably on and off for close to three weeks now. He had no history of heart disease and just had a distemper/parvo vaccine 8 days earlier and although they swear this was not a contributing factor in my heart I know that it was and the guilt I am feeling for bringing him in for this vaccine is overwhelming as he trusted me to protect him and I feel like I participated in an event that led to his demise.

He ended his life with us the same way it began I held him in my arms tight, I looked him in the eyes, I gave him a kiss and I told him that I love him.

Good bye my poop a choo, pup pup, chunky butt Sonny there is a huge hole in my heart only filled by you.

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