Lost Two Husbands to Suicide
My first husband and I were married at 21. We were married for 13 years and although we were divorced I still loved him and have 2 wonderful children with him. He had developed throat cancer and couldn't eat or drink by mouth. His parents found him dead with an empty vodka bottle next to him. That was 10 years ago. I married again and had a son with my second husband of 18 years. It's been almost a month since my husband was found dead in a garage behind his house. He shot himself in the chest. He was missing for a month before his sister found him! Although we were separated at the time I still love him dearly. He had a drug problem that I didn't know about until after we separated. Our son is the one that told me. I worry about my children. I've lost two husbands but they've lost their dads! Not a day, hardly a minute passes that I don't think of what a horrible thing we have to live with. I know this is suppose to help me to vent but I vent every day and it doesn't help! My main reason for writing is in the hope that someone reading this who may be contemplating suicide with think again. I would give anything if either of my husbands had told me they needed help. Suicide may stop your pain but you leave a lifetime of pain for your loved ones!