Lost without my husband, friend,

by Peggy Stafford
(Van Nuys Ca)

Hello, I am 40 yrs old. I lost my husband Aug.22, 2011

I am just a mess, We woke up Monday morning. drank are coffe went off to work. 2 hrs later. my life changed that is how quick i found out the news. my husband passed away going to work on his motorcycle. But whats makes it even worse is what happend. he lost control hit a post and his head & arm flew all over fwy.. I can not get that out of my mind. I was able to have him a open coffen at his funeral.
They did great with him. I screamed when i saw him. we just celebrated our 10 year anny. in July He really was all i ever wanted, I had a husband that I never had to worry about
his love for me & my daughter. My daughter had the best step dad ever.. spoiled us like crazy. I thought i was the only one feeling crazy. But I found this site, And it answered so many thoughts i have been having, I feel like I am never ever going to get better,

Comments for Lost without my husband, friend,

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Apr 24, 2013
Missing my best friend
by: Peggy Stafford

Today is April 24 2013 20 months since my husband has passed. I am hurting very much today sitting at my desk trying to put a happy face on !! 20 months ago when others told me time heals i did not believe in that.But yes time does heal some what.What it is we learn how to deal with our pain a little better.The hurt is there every day some days we can deal with it other days we just cant.It took me over a yr to get back to work I am going on 5 months at my new job.I broke down twice at work I finally had to tell the owner of my past. Thank God he is understanding and I still have a job !! Who wants a employe that cries all the time. My question will I feel this way forever !!!!!! Today I just want to run run run !! But where ??? May God Bless all us Widows !!! XOXO

Oct 16, 2012
For Peggy-One Year..
by: Vickie Calif.

Hi Peggy, It's been quite a long time since I have been here on the site. I received an email today that there was a new comment. I know that you have been going through the hardest time of your life. It has been a year since you lost your wonderful and loving husband. I just wanted to let you know that I am sure the past year has brought so much emotion and pain. People that you thought that would be there to support you may have let you down and others may have stepped up and surprised you. Just know You aren't alone and this site is a place where 'we' do know the magnitude of loss and pain that you are trying to make your way through. It is long difficult road and some days are tougher than others. I hope that you are managing as best as humanly possible. It has been over three yr's since my daughter's death. There are good days now and there are days that are still hard. I have been blessed with meeting an amazing friend from here. I will keep you in my prayers. The second year may seem even harder for a bit. I think many of us find this out and are so exhausted and asking why? I think the shock and some of the numbness wears off after the first year and the routine of life starts to set in. Hang in there and keep coming here or any place that you can find support and comfort. God bless you.

Hugs and prayer's, Vickie

p.s. Here is my personal email. Feel free to contact me anytime if you wish.


Oct 16, 2012
heart broken
by: Anonymous

My husband died 3 months ago and his children sued me to get more money. We were married almost 17 years and they still me as only wanting his money. I loved him with all my heart. And now, it is broken and I feel so alone. Just when I think the crying will stop, it starts again. This website helps

Nov 21, 2011
I know how you feel
by: Audrey

Hi, I do know how you feel! I lost my husband suddenly from a blood clot. I just passed the 1 year mark. He passed October 28th 2010. Married 30 years, we have 4 grown children and grand babies. I'm 51 and still feel so much pain. There is a site you might be interested in. Just google " when my husband dies". By Corrine. Then you can talk to other widows. I found that a month after he passed, the women have been great. We all try to help each other. My story is on here too. " He is my Everything". The first year is the hardest, but you can do this. At least that is what I keep telling myself. I am really sorry for your loss. I live in Oceanside Ca. Not far from you. We do live in a small world. Take care, God bless, Audrey

Nov 20, 2011
Thank you!!!!!!!!
by: Peggy

This is for Trish & Vickie Calif

I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart,
yes no one understands!! I can be in a room with all my family & friends i feel like i am standing
alone, I have been strong today, but no longer can
the crying has started, as i call it. I sometimes
go on for days, from the min I open my eyes in morning till bed time, reading your comments, brought a smile now to my face, Yes this web site
is great, People have said the pain will ease, But how??? I love him more each day, ,, I have him
home with me, that is what he wanted, My home is my comfort zone, Thank you again, God Bless you
both, I now know i am not alone,, my friends stopped calling,

Nov 18, 2011
by: TrishJ

I am so sorry for your loss. There are a lot of widows on this site and we all try very hard to support each others. I'm approaching the one year anniversary of my husband's death and I still miss him so much.....every day. The heartache doesn't really go away. We just learn to live with it and adjust the best we can.
Your husband didn't want to leave you. It was God's call. How do you go on? It isn't easy. It's a daily struggle. All you can do is your best. Some days it's hard just to get up and put one foot in front of the other. If we hadn't had such a wonderful love in our life we wouldn't miss it so much. It doesn't seem fair but we go.
Blessings to you and your daughter. Take it just one day at a time.
Hugs and Peace.

Nov 18, 2011
Lost without my husband,..
by: Vickie Calif.

Peggy, I am so very sorry for your loss and the pain your going through because of the tragic way he died. Death is never easy and to lose your soulmate as you did is even more difficult. My daughters death was an awful accident as well. Her car rolled down over a 150 ft. embankment an into a raw sewage pond. It was a waste management plant. She remained there for nearly nine hr's before they could pull her car up and her from it. I was there that awful night, two yr's and 3mo's. exactly today. It was on the 18th of Sept. 09 and it was a Fri. I knew that night I could not allow myself to go there. If I let my mind head that direction nothing but more pain would come. I told myself she was gone and not in pain. I couldn't bring her back but at least her suffering was over. You are not crazy and you are probably still trying to wrap your mind around what has happened. Your whole world was shattered and it will take time to find steadier ground. Your pain is fresh and for all of us who have had our loved ones gone, for a yr., or longer, this is an extremely difficult time also. Holidays bring so much with them. Allow yourself to grieve, as one person said, roll with the grief. In time, you will find more solid ground and your thoughts will be clearer. For now just know you are not alone. The people here at this site Understand and Care. As you know the world is not always the warmest place and even family and friends may not understand the magnitude of your pain, but here we All do. I will keep you and your daughter in my prayers. Remember we are here and you can find support here. God Bless You. Vickie

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