Love Is Unconditional Even After Death

by Aaron

I was notified on 15 April 2013 from my sister who received a knock on the door from police that my father had passed away in the UK. All of his family live in Australia. Whilst overseas my father was working and unfortunately his health started to deteriorate but he was functional. I am shattered but I am grateful that my last conversation with him was on April 4 2013. I love him so much and miss him. I haven't been able to stop crying. I am trying not to blame myself for not getting over there sooner. He wouldn't want me to. His death was unexpected and was sudden. I have confronted going through our conversations on Facebook. Our last conversation related to bitterness and anger which my father was consumed with in his own family. It brings me some relief that some of his last written words were that he wished for my brother, sister and myself to not go down the path he did. My conversations with my father were meaningful and never trivial. Two years ago, when his father died, I asked my dad to write a eulogy and that even though he could not be here for the funeral, I would read what he would want to say, record it and upload it to Youtube so he didn't feel alone. I did this. It is incredibly painful to know that soon I will be doing the same. My father taught me to never give in when life kicks you down and I had the privilege of watching him getting up so many times and trying again. I will never give up but this is the hardest thing i'm ever going to have to deal with in my life.

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Sep 09, 2013
Thank you
by: Aaron

Thank you Doreen. Fortunately I was able to raise enough money to fly over and pack his belongings. I miss him so much and can't stop thinking about him. I have become a stronger person for the trip I took and knowing he would want me to be happy in life, not to waste time with regret and so I am making him proud.

Apr 20, 2013
Love is Unconditional Even After Death
by: Doreen U.K.

Aaron I am sorry for your loss of your father here in the U.K. to a sudden death. It is so very difficult living overseas and not being able to be with loved one's living so far away. My sister lives in Australia and has had to fly back for 3 deaths. We catch up on Skype.
She recently flew over to support me when my husband died almost 1 yr. ago from cancer. I have 3 Adult Children who lost a father that day and it is so hard on the family coping with such a loss.
Your father sadly is like many fractured families, who find it so hard to resolve family disputes and it is so hard to resolve bitterness and anger. Which to me is a normal part of life and some people just don't know where to start to sort it all out. Communication can be so very difficult in families and this will affect the grief. There will be a lot of guilt and regret at the time of such a loss.
In my 40's I went into counselling and resolved my losses and a lot of my anger and bitterness just dissolved and I didn't find this a problem again. I find even forgiveness I struggled with just evaporated and I find life easier. Had I not had this counselling experience I wouldn't have been able to cope with life and loss of family members. For me the worst death was losing my husband. We can only survive one day at a time. But it is still a long painful journey. I am glad you had a good relationship with your father and he gave you good advice of going on in life despite setbacks. You will grieve but you will recover and go back into life with values that your father left you as a legacy for living a good life.
I wish you comfort and Peace in your grief and the support you need to help you cope with your loss.

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