Love Never Dies

by Ashlyn

I was only 3 years old when my father passed away. 3 is not old enough to be able to remember anything about him, so I have to depend on things that other people tell me about him. I have to get to know MY dad through other peoples memories, all of which they share are good sometimes funny memories (you don't speak ill of the deceased). I am now nearly 18 years old, I graduated high school this year, I am NOT a teen mom, I'm inrolled to attend college in the fall, and I have two jobs. Everyone says that my dad would be really proud of me, but would he really? He did sign me over to live with my grandparents, his parents, when I was 2. Would he even care about me or are people just being nice?
The hardest thing about loosing a parent at a young age is that you have to go through life never really knowing who they were. I know that I really do love my dad and I know that I will spend my whole life morning his death. It has already been almost 15 years and I have thought about him every single day.

Comments for Love Never Dies

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Jun 06, 2014
Love Never Dies
by: Marge

I am so sorry for your loss at such a young age. My Dad died suddenly when I was six. I am now much older than you (79)and have suffered many losses. I lost a Mother, Sister, Husband and most recently, my youngest son. Eighteen is so young to be without your Dad. Like you, I often wonder what life would have been like to have my Father longer. Try to remember what stories people shared with you and know that he is alive in your memory, although there is little you know about him. I am sure he loved you very much and is looking over you from heaven.

Marge

Jun 04, 2014
Love never dies.
by: Doreen UK

Ashlyn I am sorry for your loss of your dad and loss of the relationship you missed out on having with him in your life. It is such a deep loss that you will feel a VOID from. Especially seeing other people with father's and you have no memories. You are having to create them now. Everyone needs to know their History. It gives one their sense of Identity and helps one go on in life. You can spend time building up a picture and journal of memories created by your family and friends that will help you not just have a blank page. Many people have unhappy childhoods and grow up with dysfunction and struggle with this all their life, trying to make sense of their past and how it affects their life. Others have happy childhoods and happy memories. Some have a mixture of both. YET everyone can adapt to life. Gain knowledge and skills to help them cope and move forward in life.
You can either believe what people say about your dad, or you can let doubt creep in where you will feel anxious all the time. WONDERING. WE all come into life with difficulty trying to survive, but find a way to cope.
Your Dad gave you to his parents so they could care for you. He must have made this decision based on his circumstances. He didn't abandon you, or give you to a stranger without thought for your care. HE CARED who you went to. he didn't know he would die. He made the right decision based on what was around for him at the time. Perhaps he had to go away to find work? You can also research his life and find out your own truth. Whatever you find. Accept it and embrace it as your history. Then find a way to make your own journey in life, and write your own script about how you want your life to be, and what you want out of life. Do as much as you can to be happy and make your future better than your past. Your grandparents reared you, they also reared your father, so I guess if you turned out well your Dad must have been a Special Person.

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