M

by M
(Glasgow)

I lost my lovely dad eight weeks ago . He was a great dad and lost his life to terminal cancer. My heart is broken I find days get more difficult as the realisation that I will never have him in my life again. I am a mum with children yet i feel like a lost child now searching for my dad. I cry at the thought of him, his suffering through illness ,and go to sleep each night with hopes to dream of him just to see him again,this has not happened and I feel empty. I am having difficulty coping.

My dad was a caring person throughout my life he never criticised my failings or that of others . He never spoke negatively of anyone . He lived his life and was contented to live a basic standard of life never complained or wished for more. When diagnosed I said dad why did this have to happen to my dad , his answer was it has happened to lots of dads , younger men , he had had a long life and there was less fortunate people than him. He was grateful for the life he had lived and accepted his fate with great dignity and without complaint. He realised this was part of life course and was protecting us to the end.

We spent two weeks with dad by his bedside . All the family surrounded him and made sure he knew what love we had for him, We held his hand , not once did he not feel his hand held, as when one person let go to perhaps take a break or needed to cry, nodded to someone to put their hand in place to comfort him, He never complained and spoke to my mum and siblings, expressed his love for us even when in pain. Dad I love you, miss you and thank you for all your love.
m xx