missing him still

My dad was killed in a motorbike accident in goa in 2007...I still feel like he's gonna call me anyday..and then I remember that's never gonna happen again. He was cremated there as that was his wish if anything were to ever happen...and people took his money and bank cards..friends of his who was supposed to take me there to his funeral..so I wasn't even allowed to go to that. My heart aches and I have a beautiful daughter who will never know him. It's changed me alot..I did go off the rails before but I'm better now. I dream about him every night and that's a comfort. But sometimes it just hurts that I can't go see him.

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Dec 08, 2012
missing him still
by: Doreen U.K.

I am sorry for your loss of your dad. I think is is so sad when friends and families take over and prevent the immediate family from paying their respects, or honouring the one they have lost. It is also disgusting that such people could take your fathers's personal things. I am not surprised. I have heard that this is what happens from your part of the world in some families. Families have a strong tradition and feel that it is the eldest in the family that makes the decisions and plans. I had this difficulty to deal with when my husband died 7 months ago. My husband's family thought it was their right to decide. I did include them in all the decisions and plans and I even respected their beliefs in having a burial when my husband wanted to be cremated. But his family have even damaged things put on the grave to honour my husband. I have been accused of making them suffer for 20 days before the burial could take place. My husband died of an Industrial disease and he had to have an inquest and the coroner could not release my husband's body for burial before this time. But his family still persecuted me for this. I had to take out a police harassment order against them. Try and find some way of finding where your father's ashes are and go and say a prayer at this sight and honour him how you need to. This action of friends and family will have hurt you for a long long time. As has what my in-laws have done. they are not in-laws anymore. They became out-laws by thier actions. I have no more contact with them. You will have to find the best way forward to help you work out your grief and loss of your father. I hope you have some family to support you so that you can live in Peace.

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