Mom - my 2nd mother
She was physically there more for me than my own mother was. She was kind, sage and full of old school advice. She was a model of Catholic faith for me and great mother of 14 children with63 grands and 73 great grands. She treated me like her own child and can't say anything bad about her. She was my mother in law. My 2nd mother. I feel blessed that I knew her love.
I miss her. I feel lost and disorganized.I feel lonely though I know I am not alone in my pain. My husband is suffering too. I don't have many to talk to because my closest friends are my in laws and they have their grief too. I don't really want to be with them right now though I love them. I don't have many close friends that can support me. I have many well meaning aquaintances at church. The sun doesn't shines as bright and things that would normally delight me no longer do. I know its temporary these feelings and normal but its hard. I'm at a point in my life where our friends are taking care of their parents and my energy will now focus on my own parents. I now God is sustaining and is there for me too.
My mother in law would sigh once in a while and say "What is life?" and now I say the same thing "What is life?"