MOTHER'S DAY WITHOUT MY PRECIOUS MUM

by Heartbroken daughter
(UK)

I have survived my mum's birthday and Christmas for the first time. These anniversaries were terrible - how do I cope with Mother's Day ?

My mum and I were so devoted. We had both had terrible experiences with men. I had a marriage where I was emotionally abused - my mother had been left destitute when she was a child and then as an adult because of gambling addictions by her father and brother.

When mum was alive I was never lonely. We laughed, cried and shared so much together. I never managed to say goodbye to her (she was in a coma for four days)

Counselling failed to comfort me. I have friends who dont really understand as they have relatives who care about them. They make time for me when it suits them.

I cry every time I pass a card day shop.

Thank you for listening.

Heartbroken daughter

Comments for MOTHER'S DAY WITHOUT MY PRECIOUS MUM

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Mar 02, 2013
My mam vIsITed me on Mother's Day 3 month after her death
by: LIsa

I lost my lovely mam In Jan 2011 On Mother's Day 2012 my lovely mam came to me as I lay awake on my bed. I was awake on my side and had just had a telephone conversation with my twin who told me to ask my mam for a hug.
I was lying on my right side awake thinking of her and asking to see her just once as we had often discussed that she was to visit anyway I felt the most overwhelming euphoric love and felt my mams presence and felt her cude my left side I looked over my shoulder and could clearly see my mams head and shoulders and could feel her arm wrapped around me. We spoke but without words like telepathic I remember her saying she loved me and not to worry she was ok she looked do very happy and I felt the most wonderful loving feeling line sunshine had filled me from the tips of my toes to the topic my head. I could see my mam so clearly her face and hair as she snuggled into my neck that I reached out and touched her hair as I was telling her I loved her at that moment she was gone but I was left feeling elated and I just stayed on my bed and smiled feeling peaceful and happy and I then drifted off to sleep something of a rare occasion for me as I am a chronic insomniac. A further two year passed with no further contact I sas the odd white feather then one snowy day I walked to my friends and said out loud I need another sign mam please if it's all true and I really will see you again let me see a robin today anyway I get to my friends no robins seen. Sitting in my friends house still done hours later my friend made me a coffee nothing unusual in this except she gave it me In a cup with a robin on it! My mouth dropped in shock as I had never in all the years ild been there ever saw this cup my friend when I told her the story said oh my god I don't know why I gave you it I just felt I had to. I must point put that in my friends kitchen all get mugs she uses are on her worktop and she had to go out of her way to a cupboard and rummage to find this cup and has never used it before as she uses the cups on the worktop. Now think what you will but I know that was my robin from my mam my sign as asked for xx I love you mam and I so count my days till I am lucky enough to see you again be it in this lifetime or the next xx

Mar 01, 2013
Mother's Day without my Precious Mum
by: Doreen U.K.

Dear heartbroken daughter. I am sorry for your loss of your mother. I live in the U.K. so with Mother's Day next Sunday it will be very hard for you to honour her as you would have loved to do. Try and not be lonely on this day and perhaps go to the Crematorium or Graveside and lay flowers down and a card and still honour your Mum. You can keep a journal and write out all your feelings and hurts and you will have this to comfort you in the days ahead.
My husband died 10 months ago 16 days before his 66th Birthday and we went to the graveside and lay flowers and cards and loads of balloons tied to the graveside until my in-laws came and cut them all down. But glad we got to do this. I had to change my bad memories into good ones. I made a good start and have to keep this up. I am sorry that you found no comfort in counselling. Perhaps you had the wrong counsellor. If you are brave enough you could try again. Counselling worked well for me and I have never looked back. It was the best thing I have done for my life. My 40yrs. of depression have gone and I am more positive and able to cope better with life. Death of course throws us off balance and back downhill. We have to keep getting up. Dusting ourselves off and try again. Life is hard without our loved ones and our loving support structure with us. I decided to become that support structure for others. This is how I am coping with life. You will move forward in time and find your life again. I have lost my husband and my mum, and about to lose my Dad as he is fading fast. But I have to find the strength from somewhere to carry on. Life is hard. I hope that you find comfort and hope and people around you on Mother's Day and you find Love again in your life. Best wishes

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