My baby brother, so strong so brave so mature and protective.. I miss you with all my heart.

by Josie
(Long Beach, CA)

The worst day of my life, is May 6, 2012. My younger brother who had just turned 18 in January was murdered this day. It happened in the daytime, he called me for a ride three times the phone rang on the third i answered only to tell him very rude that i cldn't pick him up. I had to do my school work since it was finals week. The last time I talked to him i was rude to him, I will never forgive myself why didnt I just go pick him up, he called me three times and three times I ignored his call for help. It's as if he knew he was going to die and he was begging me to save him. He was my only brother, he was everything to me I played the role of parent with him always correcting his bad behavior, telling him to do his school work and to be a good man. He was always so protective of me, he always motivated me to wake up and go to school, he had recently found out he was going to be a father. He was so young yet he was so mature, he knew what he wanted in life and he went for it. Im so angry at the world, when I think of how much I fought with him it makes me sad to see I wasted so much time on silly fights. But then I tell myself that siblings are always going to fight, he loved me and i loved him with all my heart. The saying is true, we don't know what we have until we lose it. I lost the most important person in my life, and i'm lost without him. I'm angry at the person that pulled that trigger, he ran away left him there to die. He was arrested because he turned himself in later, I can't forgive him im so angry he took him from me, one bullet is all it took to take one life. His punishment shall always be to live and keep on living because those that live are the ones that keep on struggling, to survive and hes going to live the rest of his life in jail. My brother is resting he has no worries, he doesn't have to struggle he's up in paradise, looking from above. I promise my brother that i will take care of his baby thats coming on the way, and i will try to keep on living without you, life is never going to be the same i feel an emptiness those around me don't understand. Being alone is the worst feeling, he left me all alone in this world.... i just hope god lets me have my parents for a very long time i even pray he takes me before them because i can't survive another loss..

Comments for My baby brother, so strong so brave so mature and protective.. I miss you with all my heart.

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Aug 12, 2012
Josie and brother
by: Anonymous

Josie so sorry for your loss you loved your brother and Im sure he loves you too dont be too hard on yourself you are human and we all dont do what we think we are supposed to do at times I know it is a deep loss my heart goes out to you and you will always have the love between you

Aug 12, 2012
My baby brother, so strong so brave so mature and protective..I miss you with all my heart.
by: Doreen U.K.

Josie I am sorry for your loss of your baby brother. Don't let guilt ruin your life because you fought with your brother. This is normal. If you didn't fight it would abnormal. Life is full of ups and downs. It is how we grow from all the adversity in life that shapes us into who we are and will become through every trial and storm we go through. Such a brutal way to die. A tragic loss. It will be the most painfull experience of your life. Death is inevitable in life but when it comes and takes our loved ones away from us it leaves a void in our life that can never be filled. Your parents will also need to be supported whilst they grieve. If you have trouble handling this grief then see a grief counsellor who will help you all through your pain and loss. I hope that your parents live a long time so that you don't have to go through this pain again so soon. Your brother died a sudden death and this grief is great. You will have to come to terms with this loss. Life will get better in time. Take one day at a time and grieve each loss when it comes so that you will not have to deal with it later otherwise it does affect you moving forward in life. Josie Lonliness is the worst experience of losing someone in death. We feel we will never recover. It will take a long long time to get used to living again.

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