My beautiful amazing nanny <3

by Lucy Taylor

26th august 2009 that's when my life fell apart, the one person that was always there & like a mother to me had gone from my life I was 16 at the time but I did not know until last year that she was fighting cancer for 5 years and I was unaware as my parents did not tell me. Then when finally she became so ill she demanded to see me at the hospital & I went to see her I could not believe my eyes this wasn't the woman that my mom was describing as "ok" she was really ill at this point but I had to stay strong for my mom, but In the November my mom and dad divorced so now what I was I supposed to do?. So I had no time to grieve nearly 5 years later I still miss her so much I just wish I could here her voice and ask for reassurance I no longer feel safe with anything as the woman that protected me from everything has gone. I still can't come to terms with this how do I cope with this I'm now 20 years old I wish I could cope with this but it is worse than I thought, I haven't been to my grandads house in 5 years as I'm too scared because the last time I was there so was my nanny. I am now out of options of what to do:( I miss her so much

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