My beautiful daughetr Nicola
by Terri Kidman
I came across this site purely by accident, although now I feel as though it was meant to be. My eldest daughter Nicola died suddenly on December 6 2012 aged just 32 and she left behind a void that I don't believe will ever be filled. Nic was married just 6 years to David and was the most wonderful mummy to my two beautiful grandsons Joel and Zach
She was also kind, funny, compassionate, stubborn and full of life. From being my baby, she grew to be my friend and confidante and I miss our times together so much. She was more than a sister to my younger daughter Laura and I was always amazed at the special bond they shared. They even seemed to have some sort of secret language that would leave them both in hysterics (and nobody else got the joke!)
I feel completely impotent and bewildered, without answers to so many questions. Most days life takes on a surreal quality where this heartbreak is happening to another family. How could it possibly be that WE must spend the rest of our lives missing someone so essential to our existence?
I now realise that the pain of losing Nicola will never leave but if I can somehow, in the future, learn to cope then nothing else will ever hurt so much.
For now though, I spend my days and nights crying for my lost child, and just remembering to breathe.