My beautiful husband Loni

by Jackie

My husband and I had 37 years together. Not all were great, but we tried. In the spring of 2010 he was diagnosed with Leukemia. For months treatment went pretty well. On October 3rd, he fell during a stroke and hit his head hard in a parking lot. He was in critical condition for 11 days. Finally I agreed to take him off life support. It took him a whole day to die. I stayed with him as he passed on. I have never been so sad in my life. I didn't know I could hurt this much. Thanksgiving and Christmas were unbearable. Now it is New Years day and I can't stand the thought of going on without him.

Comments for My beautiful husband Loni

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Jan 02, 2011
by: Jackie

Hi Pat, thank you. The days are a struggle to get through. I pray each day my heart will not hurt so bad. I go to work and go through the motions of living. Hopefully one day I will be able to smile again.

Jan 02, 2011
37 Years for Me too
by: Pat J

I was married to my husband Joe for 37 years in August. How do we go on without that comfortable feeling of our husbands by our side? I made it through the holidays on auto pilot. It's all sort of a blur. I pray and pray for God's comfort and release from this pain. I ache to see his smile and the twinkle in his eyes, I want to feel his big strong hands (weakened by 10 years of battling heart disease but they were once so strong). I too had to make the decision to turn off the device that was keeping his heart beating.

I pray daily for all of us on this web site that are grieving for loved ones. I have lost other family members but nothing compares to the loss of my husband. I am lost in this world without him and I know you are too.

We have to take it one day at a time and try (try) to focus more on what we have. God's blessings to you in the new year.

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