My Best Friend

by Kim Whitten
(Phoenix, AZ)

Taken one year prior to his death

Taken one year prior to his death

I am 39 years old, and I lost my dad to Lung Cancer on September 26th. He was diagnosed 18 months prior in Florida where he an my mom live, and went through Radiation treatment and stayed with us in Arizona for about 9 months. We weren't sure what the outcome was going to be, so we did everything in our power to make every day as special as possible for him and us. I will admit, we had a great year together... but then he went home.
He had ups and downs, but it seemed like he was going to beat this thing. I took two months off from work to take care of him and spend more time together... and he actually seemed to rebound, so he sent me home to return to work. That was in March 2013. In September of the same year, his health started turning and I went back to try to take care of him again. I'll admit, everyone thought he would turn around like he did before, but unfortunately he did not.
He was a true fighter. The nurses couldn't understand how he was still alive the last few days, but he just wasn't ready to go yet.
On the morning of September 26th at around 7:15am, I (along with my mom, brother and sister-in-law) watched my dad take his last breath.
My life is so empty now, I miss him so much that it hurts. Even my mom has said that it hit me the hardest... because I'm the "baby" of the family (the youngest), and he and I have a really strong bond with each other that nobody could explain or duplicate. Now there is a huge hole in my heart that will never be filled again.
The picture is of me and my dad in Disneyland, taken in September 2012. I made him a deal: if he finished his radiation treatment, I would take him to Disneyland for his first time. (we are originally east coasters, and have always gone to Disney World in FL, but had always dreamed of going to the "Original" parks in CA)

Comments for My Best Friend

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Jan 09, 2014
Hello Kim,
by: Anonymous

I'm sorry to read about your father. I came to this website almost a year ago after the sudden death of my Dad. He and I were also "best friends", and even though I am a grown woman, I was still a Daddy's girl. We spoke on the phone all the time, and he was part of our daily lives. After a year of struggling through the grief, I know I will never get over this, but I am slowly learning to cope, and each day has gotten a bit easier. I hope you will be able to find some peace and comfort. Reading these posts helped me begin to heal. Everybody has their own story, and is so understanding and compassionate. Peace to you and your family, Barb

Jan 09, 2014
My Best Friend.
by: Doreen UK

Kim I am sorry for your loss of your Dad to lung cancer. This type of cancer is so very hard to get remission from. Just hearing the word cancer fills one with fear because not many people can survive this. Many people fight but one can only fight so long. My husband worked with Asbestos in the workplace and cut this material not known as dangerous. He then developed a slow growing tumour which takes 40yrs. to develop. This cancer is always terminal and no remission from. He fought hard to live. He didn't want to die. He was 65yrs. of age and we were married 44yrs. I lost him 20 months ago after nursing him for 3yrs.39days. The pain of grief is so horrendous one feels they will never recover from this and will feel this way forever. BUT. You won't. Grief is a process one goes through ONE DAY AT A TIME. You will recover from grief, but the process of healing from grief is so slow. I still have bad days now and then when memories come back, but not every day as it was in the beginning. The first 6 months for me were the hardest. I couldn't function or do anything. But then things changed daily. I took ONE DAY AT A TIME. This is the best way to heal from grief.

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