MY BEST FRIENDS

by Cindy Morrow
(Dayton, Ohio )

On June 30, 2010 our mom passed away. She was very Ill and the hurt is more today than it was then. I am the baby girl of six kids, she was the only parent we had known. We lost our dad many years before that. As a matter of fact, she was pregnant with me when our dad died.

On Saturday January 15, 2011, my boyfriend and best friend passed away from cancer. He had battled it for 10 years, but the Monster got more aggressive and took his life. I keep wondering...how do you lose your 2 best friends in a 6 month period.

This hole in my heart is mega huge and it seems like it's growing by the minute. I am so scared because I have 4 children who depend on me for everything. They will be my salvation in all of this. It's so crazy, the first death I ever encounter is my mom...then months later the love of my life.

Comments for MY BEST FRIENDS

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Jan 19, 2011
me too
by: Jackie

Hi, I lost my father and my husband within three weeks of each other in October of last year. I struggle to get through each day. The other day I almost had a good time for a very brief instant and I felt guilty that I was almost happy for a time. I feel your pain as we all do. My sympathy and support go our to you. I keep trying to remember all the good times we had. My husband and father were both very ill and the last year was very hard on all of us. I am happy I could be there with them during their final minutes on this earth. Even though my heart is breaking, I know they are in a better place. Take care of yourself, you will be in my prayers.

Jan 18, 2011
My best friends
by: M Mack

Cindy,

My heart goes out to you. Your pain is very sad and I know you are having a hard time with this. Losing a mom is very tough, your best friend. Losing the love of your life, a huge void.

God works in mysterious ways. He puts thing on our paths and we are constantly challenged, yet there is a way. Grieving and feeling the pain of such loss is making all of us very different people than who we were.

You may seek counseling from your church, and come to this site as often as you can. So many here have offered support and believe me, I need it alot. The process is long, up and down and difficult. I am sorry for you and hope you'll find a comfort zone soon. Be patient and take one breath, one step, one day at a time.

Jan 18, 2011
It's Not Easy
by: PatJ

Cindy~My heart breaks for you. I just lost my husband 7 weeks ago and the pain of his death has brought me to my knees. When I think about taking my pain and multiplying X 2~it's overwhelming to me to say the least. My son is doing OK with my husband's death but my daughter doesn't want me to even mention his name. It's hard for me because all I want to do is talk about him.

The loss of a mother is really hard on a young woman. Then you lost your soul mate just a little over 6 months later. There is just a huge void there that nothing will ever really fill. You are entitled to be mad at the world right now. It really doesn't do us any good but you are more than entitled. Your emotions are fresh and you need a good few months to just grieve before you even think about moving forward. Love those children and hold them close to you. You will find great comfort in them. You need them and they need you but you do have to have the time and space to heal.

You need desperately to be around people who understand what you are going through. There is a wonderful nationwide grief support group called GriefShare(look them up on the internet). I'm sure they will have a meeting close enough to you to drive. People who are going through what you are going through~those who have lived through it and survived~will be a great help to you.
It almost seems like huge ocean waves to a drowning person. You were barely able to catch your breath from the first crashing wave and another wave washed over you and slammed you to the ocean floor again. It's exhausting.

You can't do this alone~friends who haven't gone through the intense loss you have won't understand and won't be much comfort. It's like learning how to walk all over again. Baby steps. One step at a time.

Please don't be afraid to ask for help. This web site is wonderful with a lot of people who really care. Write your feelings and communicate with others. It does help.

God's blessings to you and your children, one breath, one step at a time.

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