My Dad and Best Friend

by In Pain

My Dad passed away 5 weeks ago. I was his only son and we were so close. He taught me how to play sports, coached me in many, and taught me important lessons in life. Later in adulthood we continued our bond and spent time fishing and watching sports. He loved my two boys dearly and always looked forward to their visits as they also are now adults. I think the first 2 weeks I was in shock and disbelief he was gone. Then it hit me and hit me hard..he is really gone. The past couple days have been the hardest.. Just about anything I see reminds me of him and knowing I cant go see him or pick up the phone to call him is killing me.

I am strong in front of my mom for the most part as she is also a mess. I am 51 and not handling this well at all. I am most likely going to go to counceling but know I will hear the usual.. it takes time.. but articles I have read state some people , after 5 or more years are still crying.

Sorry for babbling..just miss my dad!!!!

Comments for My Dad and Best Friend

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Aug 30, 2014
thank u All
by: in pain

Sometimes I feel I'm too old to be crying like a baby but can't help it. I am camping in Maine with my girlfriend this weekend and am still crying each day. So many memories and when I went away he'd always call me to ask how I was doing or having a good time. I know that call isn't coming. Also looking for a sign he is OK...wish he'd send one. Thanks again everyone..this site is a good start. God bless all

Aug 27, 2014
I feel the same
by: Anonymous

I'm so sorry for your loss. I am an only child, and was a Daddy's girl even at the age of 48. I lost my father in January 2014, and I think of him every single day. My father died suddenly, one day he was watching my son play basketball and the next day he collapsed and died. I think it has finally hit me that he is gone, but the pain is still raw. I did not go to counseling, but found much comfort and support here. I wish you the same as you begin to heal. I'm so sorry, Barb

Aug 27, 2014
My Dad and Best Friend
by: Doreen UK

You may be in pain for some time after losing your dad, but remember that grief is a process you have to go through. It is a very painful experience and counselling does help. Counsellors are professional and not there to tell you it takes time. They are guided by your thought processes and pain and will work with what you present in counselling. They are guided by their clients feelings and pain.
Your mother's experience of losing a husband will be different from yours of losing a dad.
I lost my husband of 44yrs. to cancer and my 3 Adult children lost a father 2yrs. ago. We all have different life histories and bonding experiences and this determines how a person recovers from grief. Do not make comparisons or have high expectations. In a matter of days you will move forward and see your world in a different way and the healing process will start. It is a painful experience to not have that daily interaction with your Dad and the conversations that will now just become a memory of experiences that will make you cry at first and then fill you with happiness from those memories that won't ever be lost. You will gather inspiration from your life and be able to see things in a new light now you have your own sons. You will benefit from counselling. I am sorry for your loss of your Dad.

Aug 27, 2014
Our losses are similar.
by: Friend

I empathize greatly, with what you are going through. I am in my late 40s. Like you, I have only recently lost my dad, in May of this year. I too was his only son, and few families were closer than he, my mom, and myself. We did so many things together. The pain of this loss seems almost unbearable. There are days when almost everything reminds me of him, and on those days, it seems worse now than when he initially passed away. I am considering counseling, also, but am unsure how it will go.

I stand beside you, my friend, in your grief and pain. Please know that you are not alone, and that others care about what you are going through.

Aug 26, 2014
in Pain
by: Anonymous--MI

My husband died of sudden cardiac arrest 21 months ago. The shock you speak of is something that my two adult children (son and daughter) and their spouses and my grandkids and I know about. I must say that even after these many months I still think there are moments of shock for me. I can hardly believe that my strong, kind and intelligent husband is not coming back to us. He was the kind of Dad that you say your Dad was. A man who loved and cared for his family. My husband was just 65 yrs old; had only been retired from teaching high school for 3 years. We had plans to just enjoy life, love each other and our family and look forward to growing old together. I have great faith and trust in God and I know He makes no mistakes. We all have a time to be born and a time to die. When Jesus Christ calls for us; no matter what has or has not taken place, we will cease this life. As a Christian, I know my husband is in heaven and one day I will be too. I shall see the face of Jesus and see my husband again. My children miss their Dad so much. He was my son's best friend as your Dad was to you. The pain is raw and oh, so difficult to accept. Each day is a step closer to somewhat of a healing for us. We will never be the same; what we had is now gone but we have a job to do to take care of our loved ones; to speak of and remember our lost loved one that is missed so much. We must keep our focus on God for His strength and mercy to take one day at a time. I wish I could say that it is easier for us now---not easy but we have come to accept that this is life and God has a plan for all of us. May you find peace and comfort as you take one step--one day at a time. God Bless You.

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