My Dad...My Angel

Hello to all who are grieving. I feel like I have lost my father. My father is suffering from Alzheimer's Disease, and in jail. He has been in jail for 8 months. He was a victim of circumstance, and not by choice. He suffered abuse by family members who would not believe that he was sick,and he was mentally delayed his whole life.My father faught to get away, but before all of this happened I was his only caregiver. My life revolved around him, and in a way Im greatful and in a way Im not. There is not a part of my life that my father did not touch in some way. I still wake up in the morning fixing him breakfast, and supper. I drive down the road and think that Im going to see dad. Before my father became ill he was a carpenter, and my house was the last house that he built.I prayed for God to send my father and I an angel, and I felt the Lord speak to me, and say look at your kitchen cabinets. I did, and I looked. It looked like an imprint of an angels wings. I tried for years to sand it down to get rid of it, but it didnt work. The Lord reminded me that I already had an earthly angel in my home, and I call him my daddy. I would not try to remove that now because of my dad. I miss him so bad that it feels like Ive been shot in the heart. This grief is so painful to bear,and its so debilitating sometimes. I really do not know what to do with my life now. I feel like my father was stolen from me.I feel numb,hurt,angry, and hopeless sometimes.Hopefully it will all get better.

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