My Darling Gone - My Life Changed

by jules
(Boonah,Qld)

Karumba-Gulf of Carpentaria

Karumba-Gulf of Carpentaria

How can I tell the person that John was - he had some very rigid ideas of right and wrong, he was an artist - but had no real confidence in his talent, painted for himself, though I think he was really pleased when people wanted his work. He could do anything, he was a boilermaker by trade, and worked hard. He loved unconditionally - me, his son and daughter, his grandchildren. It broke his heart that we couldn't see our granddaughter, it hurt him that our son wasn't able to see his daughter either. He missed his daughter, who moved interstate, and her family of four boys.

Through the years I would see things I liked - a windmill - he made me one, we wanted to go camping - he made us a trailer to carry the gear. Our first house was too small - he built another room on, virtually by himself. He let me be me - he grounded me (boy did I need to be grounded - still do). He did photography - taking photos and developing and printing them, not just for his family, but for friends as well, and he was the photographer for our local junior football teams.

When we were younger we wanted to buy a house, but money was tight, so he learnt how to make metal art tables and planter stands, and would work at them after work, and on Sundays, and we would go to markets and sell them, till we had enough money to build our home.

He was a "doer", a worker, a person who could see where he wanted to be, and find a way to get there. He was smart, intelligent and knowledgeable. (When I told my son his dad had had a stroke - he said that dad had absorbed too much in his brain, and it couldn't take any more.) He read - history, especially Australian history, and loved to travel to some of the places he had read about.

He was respected and liked by his workmates, and his employers.

I was going to upload a picture, but I noticed that every picture over the last six months of his life, he was walking away from me - I never noticed at the time.

Comments for My Darling Gone - My Life Changed

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Nov 17, 2010
Thank you
by: Jules

To my wonderful friends on this site - thank you - I read your comments on my post, and I cried, you understand, as a lot of others can't - I love that you can understand the man John was by my writings.

I find such comfort from this site - I am so grateful that I found it, and that there are so many understanding people who open their hearts and minds.
jules

Oct 22, 2010
celebration
by: Bernadina

Yes, John is a lovely man, a beautiful man. It is the love that remains. He is so proud of you, your strength and your faith and the way you celebrate him and who you were together.
You will find peace because he is your teacher.

Oct 04, 2010
Its all in the attitude
by:

And yours is good. You are trying to take what has been stolen from you and find some good in the life that you now have to live. The reason that John's back was to you is because he was always busy doing something, you know that. He wasn't one for idle hands and if it needed doing, He would be doing it.

I know that your having a heck of a time, That this is the time you all should be R.V'ing and I am so sorry about that. I too was supposed to be growing old with the man that I Loved and he left me alone last year. He was only 45. I try to see the beauty that surrounds me, for him instead of with him. Life will never be the same for any of us. But how do we play the hand that we were dealt, even if it feels like somebody cheated us.

I wish you well on your journey to recovery.
HH

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