My daughter in law gave my son his depression and he killed himself

by L.K
(Calgary, Canada)

On July 1, 2011, son 37 years old son fell to his death from the balcony of his condo. He was a famous dentist. He was married 3 years and 15 days to this girl. After two years of his marriage she started to put pressure on him to open his own office. My son didn't want to open his own. He was working for years with other dentists. The pressure of his wife was so much that he got depression and could not sleep at all to the point that he could not even go to work. She was forcing him to go back to work when he was sick. So we found out that he was going to work and sitting in front of his office in his car and could not rest home because of his wife. She was telling him if you don't go back to work I am going to leave you and get divorce and get half of your estate. She hid his medications and forced him to get the life insurance for her. Finally he killed himself. As soon as he died she took all his cash from the bank (a lot of cash that he saved to pay for his home) and she went to the lawyer to sell my son's estate and to send her cash. I am sure that the big Justice will get her and I am praying hard to God that she will pay for all she has done to my son before she puts her dirty hands on all his estates. She did not contribute even $1 to their marriage. She came only with one bag to his home. I am grieving hard. I am devastated. I am numb. I am not the same person. His voice is in my ears all the time. I wish God to take my life every minute. My son was kind, generous, helpful, the best son I could ever ask God. I will take my pain to my grave for sure.

Comments for My daughter in law gave my son his depression and he killed himself

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May 25, 2012
How Evil. ! So Sad !
by: Anonymous

I was searching for some kind of guide for depression after an accident, and stumbled upon your story. It appears that she had her sights on the big bucks! She only had worldly and material goals in mind for herself, and not being a supportive wife or friend to your son! As the others have said,... pray for her, as that is what I do..... As for my searching for guidance on here, I however, am seeing a big change in my son here lately after he suffered from an automobile accident, and his girlfriend seems to make him cry on almost a daily basis, and she don't understand that he cannot just jump up and walk, when the doctors insisted that he bears no weight til he is released to physical therapy after his bones heal. She thinks that he is being a baby, and that his healing will take so much longer if he waits. Then, she causes him to cry and get upset over money issues and on and on and on. After I had a long talk with her on the phone, .... now it seems like my own son don't want to talk to me at all about anything!!! After reading your stories, I am really getting concerned and my heart hurts! I have been told to leave him alone, as he is a big boy, however, I see all of this going on, and have been reading about depression after a serious auto accident which is a high statistic, and now with her making him sad on a daily basis, I am extremely concerned! I want to do something, but don't know what to do. I am sorry about all of your losses, and am glad you have shared, ... maybe these stories can help others such as my son! Blessings and peace to all!

Jan 05, 2012
Forgiveness
by: Anonymous

"As long as you don't forgive, who and whatever it is will occupy rent-free space in your mind."--Isabelle Holland

Why let this woman continue to torment you also? It is better to try to forgive and so you can focus on your own grief over this heart-breaking loss.

With much sympathy....

Dec 14, 2011
My son died thanksgiving morning 2011
by: Anonymous

I can feel your pain intensely and I am having great difficulty forgiving my sons fiancee also. She helped drive him to his grace - he was 37. I don't say this because I am his mother but many other people feel the same way. She is a cruel and evil person. Because of domestic partner laws I am his nearest blood relative but she was in total control of everything and I have no rights - it is terrible. She has been evil towards my family and my daughter who is my only surviving sibling. She is a evil, evil person and God will deal with her some day but it does not make it any easier right now. I don' know what to say but that I am very sorry for you r great loss. Mine is so fresh so it is difficult for me to say too much. I just spent four days in the hospital because of her cruelty - i wish people would realize this nightmare can happen to them and be prepared. If your child is living with someone there is a new paper they need to fill out if they want you to take care of them if anything every happens to them. It can happen but I don't wish it on anyone. It is a nightmare. I cannot sleep because I'm afraid to wake up and to realize that it is not a dream. I love my son with all might heart. I pray for all of you and all I can say right now that is getting me through is that I know my son loved me and he is at peace. I love you all. I pray for Gods peace for you all.

Nov 18, 2011
The Big Picture
by: Anonymous

Dear Friend,

I feel your pain and sorrow and I am so sorry for your loss. Our children become our life and to lose one is as if we lose part of ourselves. Your journey into grief has barely begun. Give yourself time to be numb, be sad, to shed tears, to just be. But I agree with your other friends who have written here, forgiveness is key. To wish for God to heap revenge on her even onto death, is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die. The harm is done to you. Grieving is hard work and it will be easier if you give it to God...along with all your feelings towards this woman. She is being punished every waking moment. What is so amazing about our God is that He loves her too! So please don't waste your energy thinking about her. Give her to God to take care of and allow yourself to begin to heal. "...sorrow and sighing shall flee away.” Isaiah 35:10, AMP GT

Nov 15, 2011
Try to Forgive (It's Not Easy)
by: TrishJ

My sister-in-law basically did the same thing to my brother many years ago. He died at 32 because she completely took away his will to live. It was terrible to watch.
Ever heard of Karma? What goes around comes around. I don't think my sister-in-law ever really had an enjoyable day after my brother died. She apparently did have a conscience and suffered greatly for 20 years. Drugs and alcohol over took her. She died a horrendous death of liver cirrhosis and lingered in the hospital for 90 days on kidney dialysis. I didn't wish that on her and actually cried the day she passed away. She was a wonderful person when they first got married. I don't know where the evil came from that over took her and made her do to my brother what she did. I think everything we do while we are on this earth, we pay for eventually. I didn't pray for my sister-in-law. I was too angry and too full of hate. I should have. It ended up taking a toll on my life and health. It's not easy to forgive but your daughter-in-law is obviously a very disturbed person. Normal people just don't act that way. The negative energy eats you alive. It's hard to let go of the anger and bad feelings but you have to try. Pray to ask God how you go about forgiving her. She is a lost soul.
Take it one day at a time and I wish the best for you.
PJ

Nov 15, 2011
Let go of this hatred.
by: Sue

Hello,
Your story touched my heart. Your grief is being intensified though by the hatred for your daughter-in-law and you will never heal unless you can let it go.
Please try. She will have to live with this behaviour for the rest of her life and however callous you think she is being, she must be suffering agonies of remorse and self loathing for the things she has done. Her actions right after your son's death do not seem to me to be the behaviour of a rational person.
Dr. Phil once said ( and I have never forgotten this) that to forgive a person for a wrongdoing does not condone that persons' behaviour but enables you, as the one who forgives, to be able
to free yourself from that person and start to rebuild your life. It is early days for you - I have recently lost my beloved husband of 42 years so I know about grief and how long it takes - but try not to carry bitterness with you on your grief journey; the road is rocky and hard enough without it!!
I am thinking of you with love,
Sue

Nov 14, 2011
let go x
by: Anonymous

oh my god my heart goes out to you from one mom to another. this is so so hard for you and i dont know how you will ever go about doing this but in order for you to move on and get some peace you have to let go of what that 'lady' did to your lovely son. her conscience will be her punishment no matter how hard she may seem. someday...young or old she will reflect (even if she fights it).....please just try and let go.....her problem.....now about you .... let go....nothing will bring your lovely son back and he is at peace but you have got to stop letting this eat you up....once you let it go.....so hard i know....you will start to pick up the pieces of your life again... stay strong......
kind regards
a friend on her own bereavement journey xxx

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