My dear wonderful friend Fred

by Julie Kapeller
(Gladwin Michigan)

My best friend ever passed away June 12th 2010 and I just found out Sat. June 18th. I had been phoning him for over 2 weeks (he had Lymphoma) and he ALWAYS returned my calls immediately. My fiancee and I had been to see my father who is also in end stage and I told him I have such a bad feeling about Fred. we got home and we googled obituaries and found it.

There was a lot of unnecessary bad feelings from 20+ yrs ago between his daughter and myself, so she never informed me he had passed. To find out online was devastating, I never got to hold his hand 1 last time or say my goodbyes to him. He was here to visit us on the farm the end of March and he promised me he would have someone contact me when the time got near. I think he may have but because of the old feelings I was not included.

His unconditional love, his friendship, he was like a surrogate dad to me for over 20 yrs and I can't imagine not hearing that deep raspy voice anymore or the ice cream runs at midnight because he knew I wanted it. I loved him with all my being and I wanted to have the chance to be with him at the end to say things that needed saying and I feel that was taken from me, so I am bitter and angry over this and am struggling with that.

But to all who never heard of Fred Barber, let me tell you you missed out on an amazing man. 62 is way too young to go but heaven is the winner in all this and I pray his suffering is over and he is with his sisters, brother, mother and father, enjoying bowling, and golf. Oh boy did he love golf!!!!!!

May you forever know the love I had and will always have for you my friend, my 2nd dad. And may you always know you are in my heart forever. The bears you bought me are all in the living room and they will remain there as a tribute and as having a part of you with me always.

Much love I miss you, may you rest in peace!!

Love
Julie and girls