by pam slavens
My grandson Patrick was 18. He died the 26 th of Nov 2012. He was at a friends house and somehow a gun was brought out and my grandson was shot in the head. the pain is unbearable. I raised Patrick from 5 months old. He is like my own child. His baby sister who is 4 knows he isnt coming back but doesnt understand why. He was her hero and he was my sunshine and the very air I breathe. He was the reason I woke up every morning. Patrick loved his church and was friends with all he met and in the end that was what took him. The house he visited was a known drug house altho to look at it you would never know. We didnt and I am sure Patrick didnt.The 20 yr who shot him is a known dealer. this we did not know either.He seemed to be like other young men. So far it is being called an accident but in our hearts we know it wasnt. the detective says it is a matter of getting the forensics back before he can be charged with Pats death.
what is so wrong and unfair is this same house was raided in June 2012 and guns and drugs were found but they were never charged. Had they charged them Patrick would still be with us. I am hurting so terribly and yet in the next moment I feel a white hot rage.Patricks services are tomorrow and I have to face the inevitable. He isnt coming home and this isnt a cruel joke. I try to tell myself that they are wrong and it could not be my Patrick and he will come home. I hear the wind against the screen door and my heart jumps. I found a bag of deer jerky a friend sent to him and i thought oh i need to give this to Pat. he loves it and then reality sets in and it devastates me once again. I dont know how to go on from here without him.