My Love Marsha Lost after 41 Years

by Rick

Went out to dinner last nite without Marsha.I took 2 of my grandkids, very sad to see couples sitting, talking, laffing, holding hands.I had to give it a try. Came home and cried just miss marsha so much, only 6 weeks. But i will keep going no matter how hard. Marsha made me promise to take good care of the kids, and grandkids 6 boys 1 girl, when she passed. NOW ITS UP TO ME. Having a very very very hard time with all of this. Marsha was and IS the LOVE of our lives.

Comments for My Love Marsha Lost after 41 Years

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Mar 28, 2011
So very sorry


You will take care of the kids and the grandkids as you promised. That does not mean that you need to do it before you are emotionally ready. It is much like emotionally flogging yourself, pushing to do what is so very hard for you.

Do what you think yourself capable of doing. The kids will take care of their kids and you can heal for now.

As I look back on my own grief I think that my biggest mistake was trying to keep things normal.
There is no normal in grief. Far down the line you find yourself doing things for yourself that make you happy. And that is very hard to do at first, nothing can make you happy until months later when you try to crawl out of the depths of grief. There is a time and place and only you can decide what you need today.

Keep a journal write Marsha, tell her how you feel. Later you can see how far you have come but, that is much later. Many back an forths bad days and worse to start, then an o.k day here and there.

Mar 28, 2011
Keep going
by: Maria

Rick, I am sorry for you. Keep going and you will get there. I too find it difficult having lost my beloved. But I cannot understand how you feel as your suffering is unique and special.

Your Marsha is very special and your love was special.

Cry when you feel like it. May God comfort you and wipe away your tears.

God Bless


Mar 27, 2011
I Feel Your Pain
by: Terri

I am so sorry for your loss. My husband of 31 years died suddenly approx. 3 months ago. No one can understand how you feel unless you have experienced this type of loss. Friends in an effort to comfort you will tell you their stories of grief when their parents died etc. but they will not compare to losing the person you have been with virtually your entire life. My husband and I worked together as well so we spent 24/7 with each other. I know the pain is almost to much to bear and I cant say it is easy because It isn't. The only I can do for you is tell you that I know how you feel and pray that God will ease your pain a little each and every day.

Mar 27, 2011
The lonely dinner
by: Colleen

I too went out to dinner, it was my daughters birthday the whole family went all were with their spouses and partners. I sat there watching everyone with their partners. It feels like a knife is ripping out your heart. Take strength in the fact that you managed to get through the dinner without having a meltdown. My prays and love to you may the Lord give you strength in this long and painful journey.

Mar 27, 2011
Oh.....The Grandchildren
by: TrishJ

I'm going through the exact same thing. My husband Joe passed away 4 months ago. My big, handsome, strong, body building husband was reduced to tears every time he thought about his not being here to see the grandsons grow up. They were his life.
I have to carry on alone. I promised him I would keep his memory alive as best I can. I've started writing (to each one personally) little books of things he liked, all the facts of his life, funny memories. I'm also doing a pictorial dvd which I will give them when they're older.
My youngest grandson (just turned two last November) asked me again, "Where's pop pop?" yesterday. I'm dreading when the day comes that he won't ask anymore? He's only 2 years old but he knew grandma and pop pop always came to his house together. Now it's just me.
Blessings to you Rick. You're brave for venturing out. Love your family and keep them close. Make Marsha proud. God bless you.

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