My MawMaw

by Allison
(Kentucky, USA)

My MawMaw just passed on Valentine's Day of this year, 2013. We found out just 3 weeks ago tomorrow that she had Ovarian Cancer. She had been very sick for about 6 months and was so weak and stubborn that she didnt' go to the doctor until 2 or 3 months prior to her passing. She and my sisters lived about 45 minutes apart from each other, so I saw her on the weekends.
I miss her so much and want her to be here with me, but I know that is selfish of me because she is with Jesus (and I know that for a fact). I really wish I could go into her house and sitting in her chair with the heat turned way up and the television blaring and her recounting stories to me from way back or what her great grandchildren (my two lovely cousins, and she is expecting one more ((my neice))in March of 2013) great grandchild, a little girl.
I wish she could have waited just 4 more weeks to see her, but she saw her forming and knows she is there. I love you Maw-Maw!!! Love Always, your little girl, Allie Bugs!

Comments for My MawMaw

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Mar 05, 2013
I'm very sorry about your loss.
by: Anonymous

Wow.. This is so crazy .. I lost my grandma at the exact same time .. It was a sudden death kind of thing.. I have been really upset about it and feels kind of good in a way that finally one person knows what I am going through

Feb 21, 2013
Dear Alli,
by: Pat

You are in the throws of the raw stage of grief, when it feels like an open wound that will never heal. We all wish we had had more time with those we lose. Unfortunately, we don't get to choose when God needs us with Him. I have a feeling that your mother's illness was so advanced that even if she had sought medical care earlier, it would not have made much difference. Perhaps, she knew, deep inside, that she was seriously ill, but did not want to go through the chemo, etc. treatments and let it go, until she was too sick to have possibly lived. I hope it will give you some peace to know that your mother died the way she wanted to and did not have to endure surgery, chemo, or whatever awful treatments the doctors might have had to offer. Had you ever thought that your mother might have avoided medical care because she did not want her loved ones to see her go through all of that?

I am a volunteer for a hospice agency and have seen quite a few people die. I have come to believe that some people, who are actively dying, can actually will their time of death. I think your mother was trying to spare you any more heartache. She was also, probably, in a lot of pain. It will take you some time to get through this, but you will. You are blessed to have had such a wonderful mother. She is at peace now and you will find peace too, in time. Your mother will be there for the birth of her new great grandchild. You will see her spirit watching over you and smiling with pleasure for the new baby. I lost my mother too. I know the hurt and pain. Honor your mother's memories with a scrapbook or whatever feels right. You will be able to follow in her path and tell the old family stories yourself one day. I wish you peace and comfort. Pat

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