My Mom, my Rock

by Mellene
(Secane, PA)

On September 24, 2010 my mother had a massive heart attack from which she never recovered.She was in the ICU for three days never regaining consciousness on a ventilator. When all the meds stopped working for her I told them to turn the machines off. I was at her side the whole time wishing, hoping, praying that she would wake up. She never did. On that early Monday morning my life changed forever. I love and miss her so so much. She used to call me everyday. She even called me the morning of her heart attack but I did not hear the phone and she left a message. She sounded fine and only a few hours later she was gone. I don't think she ever really recovered.I had the message on my phone but somehow it got erased. I just wish I could hear her voice right now. I just love her so very much and need her now more than ever. So much has happened in my life since she has been gone and I need to talk to her in person. I do talk to her daily and ask her to give me strength and I know she does as I can feel it. I sit here crying as I write this and I know I need to let it out more. Thank you for this opportunity to do so.

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Feb 01, 2011
Crying for you!
by: Cindy

I am crying reading this. My husband of 35 years had a heart attack at work. They took him to the ER and wanted to keep him over night. They brought him to the Oklahoma Heart Hospital and the next morning did quadruple bypass. He was in the hospital for one week, I brought him home and he was doing great. He even brought me breakfast in bed one morning which he was not suppose to be doing anything. He was such a sweetheart. He just sat down in his chair after I had him home for two weeks and said he felt dizzy and just feel back. I am in so much grief and I miss him so much. He was my whole life and I just don't know how to live this life without him. I was 18 years old when we married. He was 10 years older and he would have been 64 on February 19th. My birthday is the 15th and our anniversary would have been February 7th. I just want to forget about February. We just don't understand it and I would love to hear his voice too. I miss him hugging me and kissing me and telling me how very much he loved me and how beautiful I was. I just don't understand why God took him away from me! I am praying for you too for some comfort. My mom calls me everyday too and I know I will miss it when she is gone if I don't go first. I would have never thought Rusty would have left before my parents. He was in good health and had no heart problems. Never even had pain when he had his heart attack..

Jan 30, 2011
by: Anonymous

I'm so sorry about your mom. I lost my son almost 6 months ago and there's not a day that goes by that I wish I was dead. I have four other children and I'd never do that to them. When I read letters like yours it reminds me too of the pain I'd inflict on them.

As for your phone message....go to your carrier. My son's girlfriend was able to retrieve messages that she had deleted through her carrier. I also was able to retrieve a phone message from my son. He had called me from the hospital to wish me happy birthday. He died 8 days later from leukemia. That message is very precious to me.

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