My mom

by Mary Ruth Harrill
(Knoxville TN)

I lost my mom on Oct 5,1997. She committed suicide. She had fibromyalgia.

The day Mom died was total chaos. I knew I had to be the strong one. Dad passed out. I called 911. I remember screaming at the 911 operator, asking her to please make the ambulance hurry. I checked Mom's pulse. Her skin was cold and clammy. I kept thinking that if the paramedics got there fast enough we could save her. Mom had done this before and we got her to the hosital. The paramedics tried to revive her, but I didn't realize she had also shot herself. There was a bullet in the wall where she had missed the first time. She had shot herself in the mouth and took about 400 pills.


The ambulance took Mom to the hospital and we were left with the empty house.

Mandy had been sent next door to the neighbor's. I had to explain what had happened to her. I also had to find the words to tell her that Granny wasn't ever coming home.