My Morgan

by Jeanie
(New jersey)

My daughter Morgan was 19 when I found her in her bed on May 19th 2014...she overdosed on my husbands fentanyl patch which we kept locked up...she wasn't a drug addict but always had problems sleeping..she found my keys and sucked the gel out, buy the time I got to her it was too late I will never get that image out of my head the guilt my husband and I are going thru you can't imagine, she was a beautiful young woman who was studying to be a nurse

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Jun 22, 2014
Thank You
by: Jeanie

I can't thank you all enough for your comments, just when your think your alone we are not..everyone is going thru the same pain my husband and I are going thru...Thank You

Jun 20, 2014
your daughter
by: Anonymous

I too lost my son to heroin. It is an evil drug that is ruining so many lives. My son was ashamed of his addiction. And how I wish there was a cure. Some people can kick this habit, but many, like my son, cannot. I loved my son more than anything in this world. And I will miss him until the day I die. I am sorry for your loss. She is very beautiful.

Jun 19, 2014
Your daughter
by: Kate

I'm so sorry you have to endure the loss of your beautiful daughter. My son was not a drug addict either but drank beer and one night took cocaine that was offered him because he was depressed over a break up. The two together create another dug the autopsy said- and it stopped his heart. It is devastating ! It has been a year and a half and I cry some every day then put it away so I can face the ones who are here
It's hard!! The deepest hurt I have ever known,you go through all kinds of emotions but we do somehow go on. Anything you feel is normal because it is so huge a grief. Take one day at a time,sometimes one minute at a time. I hope you lean on Heavenly Father,I know no other way. I don't know how I have endured without asking help all the time.

Jun 18, 2014
My Morgan
by: Doreen UK

Jeanie I am so sorry for your loss of Morgan. I remember when I was 19yrs. and had my whole life in front of me. Morgan has been robbed of this due to one mistake. Little did she realise the consequences of such an action. Your husband and yourself will be facing the normal guilt that grieve causes. But it shouldn't last. If it does then go and see a grief counsellor.
You kept this patch locked up for a purpose and reason. Morgan broke into this space that ended her life. Often we beat ourselves up wishing we could go back and change a circumstance that is killing us inside. But we can't. Nothing worse than losing a child/adult child so very young. Losing my husband of 44yrs. to cancer 2yrs. ago was my worst experience of loss. Next would be to lose one of my 3 adult children. I worry about them all the time. Pleading with God for their safety each day. You and your husband need to nurture each other back into life and coping with your loss. This will help both of you to start to heal from your loss. In REALITY, it is going to take a long time before you heal from your loss. A parent never Fully recovers from the loss of a child. You just survive and take one day at a time till the grief pain gets less.

Jun 18, 2014
by: Jolynn

I am so sorry for the loss of your lovely daughter Morgan. How awful to have found her the way you did. That is very traumatic. Losing a child is the most excruciating pain there is. Even in the doctor's manual it states that the loss of a child is the most stressful thing a person can endure even beyond major bodily trauma. I lost my funny, outgoing son about a year ago. He was 26. Was an officer in the Marines training to be a fighter pilot. He had many friends, was the life of the party, was brilliant and had a fantastic future. Unfortunately he got on pain pills and when he ran out of those he switched to Heroin because it was so cheap. He died of an accidental overdose. They say the brain doesn't fully develop in the neo cortex region until about age 25. That is an area where judgment comes into play. Young people feel invincible as if nothing can hurt them. They have heard the horror stories and know the dangers but feel it would never happen to them. Most kids try drugs, it's just the way it is unfortunately. Our kids were the unlucky ones they paid the highest price. It is so terribly sad. I sleep with my son's shirt. I cry about every day for a few minutes. It has been a roller coaster ride of emotions. You have to go thru so many "firsts" without them. Their death anniversary. their birthday, all the Holidays. Nothing feels the same anymore, the simple joys of life are gone. Your daughter was beautiful. I wish you some peace and I feel your pain. I am so sorry you have to endure this.

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